So I Tried Neverness to Everness..

People said this game is a lot like Grand Theft Auto or something. I don't know necessarily if it is, but I'm going to try it out and see. Yes, it's release day. It's finally here. Like I I watched Let me see the first time I watched a trailer for this game. Asmongold in TE. How long have I been literally 1 year ago, 1.1 million views. This got a million views? Record, okay. You want them to be pink? Well, that's going to take you 20 hours. This is me complaining about Tower of Fantasy. I can immediately tell that I I can immediately tell that's what it was. Okay, so I'll try this game. I want to see what it's like, right? And you know, again, we'll see we'll see how it's going. Who's this Audi? Yeah, sure, right? And it's Grand Theft Auto. No, I I don't know anything about the game at all. We're going to try it out. We're going to see how it goes, okay? Is this an auto different game? No, no, different game. Totally different game. And yes. And so I I didn't even realize Yeah, so I've I've been looking to play this for a long time. It came out last night. I watched Rich play it a little bit, but only really a little bit. This is the first time I I I have never played. I didn't do any of the betas or anything. I'm going in raw. We're going to see what it's like. Where to get it? I don't know. Just Google it. I'm feeling like they probably should have told me a better way to say that, but yeah, just look it up on Google. It's probably somewhere on there, right? And okay. All right, gentlemen, we're here. Today we're going to begin an adventure. Um I don't know how this is going to go. My goal is to I want to be able to get a car and see if I could run people over. I don't know if it'll let me, but we're going to find out. That's a very loud start, to be honest. I can turn it up and down. It's totally fine. Okay, uh let's see what it's like. All right, start. Okay, so I have to pick between a girl and a boy. Um yeah, we're going to pick the guy, obviously. Okay, so yeah, we're not going to be a girl, very clearly. That's not loud. I can just turn it up and down. It's not too big of a deal. All right, let's do it. You can go in first person, can I? I I don't even know how it works. Confirm. Oh. Now what? Oh, they got goth chicks in here, too. All right. Is that like a global warming? Uh-oh. What the [ __ ] Why did you do that to the Subaru? I thought it said hog back. I love how there's almost no exposition at all that explains it. It's just instantly this within 1 minute of the game. Okay. Great. We're just going to speed run this. Is that Saiko now? I think so. [music] I thought this was anime GTA. That's my understanding. Uh-oh, there's zombies. It's crashing out. Is there a movie like this? I forgot the name of what it was. Like if you look at a monster, it like turns you crazy. I watched it. Oh my god. Oh my god. Is that me? That's not me, is it? Yeah, guys. Jesus. What's with the hair? Nope. Too short. Um so now what? Oh. Waves detected, yeah. What, so she just sits there and does nothing? So she turns into a bat. It feels like I'm about to have to play the game. Wait, I have to play as her? Okay, okay. Um all right, so she does Oh wait, I All right, move away. All right, move out of that. Okay. Oh oh oh. This is an old So I just had a bunch of cars run at them. All right, this is pretty easy. Oh, I [ __ ] up. Okay, I'm fine. Look over here. And I killed them all, I did. Damn. Wow, I [ __ ] up. Oh, it's a cinematic. I thought that was me doing another attack. You're playing as a girl? Shut up. We're going to fix that. I'm going to be a furry soon. Never mind, I'm a furry now. All right, let's go. Oh, he's over 50, too. See, I have like a perfect dodge. I'M trying to understand how all this works. This is pretty decent. You dodge right away. Yeah, yeah, you can dodge. Like it is pretty uh it's pretty easy to understand. Let me see All right. Like if you played one of these before, you you know how how it works. Okay. Now let me get a second place on check. Well, that's kind of cool. I'm trying to see what the combat's really like. Okay, all right all right all right, so what if I use the That's the old? Not so bad, huh? Okay, let's go over here. Get this one. So I killed all three of them, right? This [ __ ] is crazy. Not cool, but like actually [ __ ] nuts. Damn. [sighs] Mhm. Is this Sephiroth? No, I think it's actually No, it's a girl, right? Is it a girl or a guy? I think that's a I think that's a guy, right? Has to be a guy. Yeah, it is. Oh, is that me? Oh, [ __ ] That perfect angle. How'd you find such a prime viewpoint? Nullification of the hyper-vortex has suddenly accelerated. I need to know why. Found the nexus. I guess the more you stare at its core, the faster the nullification? The anomaly that you can't look at? Surprisingly fragile. How does this work? Is it the volume? That's kind of cool. The [ __ ] What? What are you? What am I? Careful. Can you move? No, it makes more sense to cut the car in half. It makes Yeah, true. A known anomaly just appeared in New Helios. Yikes, this one's a problem. Wait, did So, wait, did you respond? How did that work? It's like Shadowlands. Nullified. Part of a search? Hmm. Well, What the [ __ ] Looks like You're coming with me. So, they just blew the whole place up and now they're gone? Can you turn max FPS? Yeah. Oh my The [ __ ] is this? It's [music] been over a dozen songs. Can't you switch to a quieter channel? Someone over there, Mike Jones, is that it? I am the destiny [music] nemesis. The bringer of Super Smash Brothers. Nullifying fine. Since I won't be able to keep you company for much longer, I'll let it slide this time. All right. Is it possible that the supernatural abilities of Espers have the same origin as anomalies? Hmm. The homology theory is one of the existing hypotheses in academia. Simply put, it suggests that Esper abilities are not powers derived from human functions, but rather powers granted to humans. So, you're a magic chosen one, is that it? Oh-oh. I'm the one. I know. Oh, how time flies. We're already here. Is even his normal dialogue auto-tuned? Never mind, sit tight. Let's go out with a bang. Next trajectory, quantum drift. Can't let those uptight folks look down on you. Uh-huh. It's one over. Got to report to Good luck, buddy. So, this is where I have to talk to Oh-oh, okay, this is this has got to be me, right? Welcome to the [music] Hethero Bureau of Anomaly Control. Nice to meet you. I am Nelly, the secretary to Nelly, I just got done talking to T-Pain. Hello, Miss Nelly. The director is in the office right now. Please follow me. Was this Doctor Who? So, I have to go inside of the red uh the red Do you Do people now not know what a phone booth is, by the way? Cuz I feel like now, like, aren't people too young to know that? reception hall. It usually handles scheduled low-threat anomaly cases. Yeah, they they don't even know what the hell that is. Are these numbers related to anomaly fluctuations in the city? Yes. The Wertheimer index measures how much an object deviates from reality. Uh-huh. By monitoring [music] the changes in the Wertheimer index within a certain area, we can respond to emerging anomalies. The Wertheimer index in the half board strongly fluctuates. This six won't last very long. Oh, man, just a class five? I thought I could finally have some fun. I'll go ahead. See you at the site. It's pretty bold of me to say. Not the furry, it's okay. I'm not going to get him. There's no way he's a good character, Who's that? Wait, we'll get the girl, for sure. None of your business. None of your bi- Damn, bro, like they Okay, so Oh, wait. Oh, wait. Okay, all right, so let me look around. Okay, so this is it. Dodge is left click. Okay, and is there a jump attack? Yes, there is. Okay, so I can do a jump attack. And I can do this, too. Can I hit somebody? Okay, I think I kind of can. All right, let me look around. Plan A might not give us the desired effect. You're right. My mom had this computer. Yeah, she's had this computer like back in uh 19 uh like I don't know, like 1904 or something. 1994. Follow Nelly to the Who's this? This is guaranteed a playable character. This is absolutely Who is this? Oh my Commander. I I mean Miss Nelly. How about the new containment safety protocol exam I'm taking tomorrow? Seeing you so spirited, Mint, puts my mind at ease. Is this an anomaly for temporary containment? A troublesome sent [music] over by a senior colleague. They haven't found a way to nullify it yet. Oh my The higher-ups told me to put it in temp con for now. Dude. Hey, are you the newcomer? Hello. Welcome to our team at the Bureau of Anomaly Control. Hey, wanted to say This character's got to be really good, right? with me in unit two, you'll be in good hands. I don't know what she's talking about. This is the director's guest. Just kidding. If you're with the director, She's one of the worst characters? No, she's not. But, if you ever want [music] to join the CSU, feel free to ask me for a recommendation letter. Mhm. All right. No, she's not. All right, so Oh, wait. Where were we? Okay, never mind. So, I just Okay. They just immediately took it away from me. Hey, just ran into Captain Vice Superintendent CN Body of Assistant Oh my Oh, she's doing Oh my god, bro. Looks like they're heading out on a mission. Is there an anomaly somewhere? Oh, man. What's the second article of the confidentiality agreement? Oh, man, farming is Sims hard. It's um She's so lovely. Is that right? That's my player about information unrelated to the Is this an anime or a game? It's about to be a game. I'm about to play a game. Bye, Coco. Oh my god. Okay, so Mint says everyone has a unique scent, and she likes to nickname people based on what she smells. To her, you probably smell like Coco. What? Coco. I smell like I do think that like you're getting to the point to where like these games have like a like a graphical like fidelity level. Chapter The guest [music] has arrived. It's actually really good. Like if you actually look at the uh like the ground and the colors, this is a lot This is a lot better than it was whenever I started playing these games like quite a while ago. Like this is good. Art style, yeah. Who's this? The Escorter from Groth Island [music] has finally learned to be punctual. Hmm. This should be our first official meeting. I don't know if I like the cat girl. pleasantries and get straight to the point. I think I might still like the cat girl more. Seven weeks ago, New Helios experienced a class seven anomaly disaster, hyper-vortex. you guys think? You appeared with an unknown anomaly, both undetectable from the Wertheimer index. We have never seen anything like this. The hyper-vortex was nullified, and Code Zero disappeared as well. You, [music] who were brought back from the scene, have no memory of anything before your appearance. During your observation on Groth Island, did you recall anything about [music] the code zero or your past? Wait a minute. no memory of anything before. After the hyper [music] vortex incident, the code zero reappeared briefly. You having faced it at the scene should understand its difficulty better than anyone else. Due to your unique connection and keen perception of anomaly nexus right? we hope we could join efforts in containing code zero. Yeah, I mean is both a shackle and an opportunity for you. Classic amnesia. Perhaps through pursuing code zero, you may uncover your past. Once [music] the contract is sealed, no one can break its binding. Damn, uh-oh. So I have to sign a contract. Wait, I wasn't paying attention. Contract is required Okay, Asmon No. I can't I can't. I can't put Mongol in there. Okay, Asmon. All right, we're just going to do Asmon. That's fine. Doesn't matter. Since code zero is undetectable by the Wertheimer index, we cannot predict when or where it will appear. What we can speculate is that it is highly Asmon, no. drawn to anomalies of class seven or above. What class am I? you will need to handle it together. you can settle in and work here. Ooh. I got a business card? antique shop. What is this saying? Well, being an antique shop, it's actually a team of anomaly hunters. Oh, wow. Besides the bureau, there are various groups and individuals handling anomaly containment and nullification known as anomaly hunters. I don't need to stay here for further observation. Thank god. Consider it a thank you for helping nullify the hyper vortex. Living in Hetherew will likely be more interesting So like I can go all around in the city, off. Will do. I'm ready to drive around. I want to run some people over. Oh, it's just cinematic again. Space anomaly. Initiate crisis response What the [ __ ] Containment unit. Identify unit for containment breach. Containment breach. Anomaly Uh-oh. Anomaly 007 in breach. [crying] I don't know. This is This is a tough one. Yeah. I knew it. Recontain it as soon as possible. Sorry, director. I'm on it. This is This is That's a That's a tough decision. Though it's a low threat anomaly, underestimating it will still lead to consequences. Oh, [ __ ] Wait, I have to go in here? All right, where's Where's the Where's the other one? Okay, it doesn't let me All right. All right. So, all right, investigate. Is this another dimension? They put me in the It They put me in the forest realm. There she is. Coco, are you here to help? Yes. Yes. You seemed troubled earlier. Mhm. Oh, here No load time. I got a good computer. Once we deal with this thing, let me treat you to a feast. Let me treat you to a feast. spatial abilities. Finding the nexus in such a large area I'm getting a headache. Okay. Nexus. The key to containing or nullifying an anomaly is called a nexus. What the hell is this? It's usually related to the anomaly's or cause. I must have destroyed the hyper vortex's nexus at that time. Oh, director, you're here. Coco and I will complete the mission. Uh-huh. never worked in our organization before. Mint, make sure you explain everything carefully. Her name is Mint? It's kind of Honestly, it's a [snorts] boy. aka oddity. You mean [ __ ] things I have to kill, types of anomalies. Oh, really? Help protect you. Leave it to me. So do I fight with them or do I fight Do I use them? Come here. Okay, I thought Okay, that's what I thought. Leave it to me, Mint. Okay. All right, so level one. This is pretty simple. All right, let me let me use the girl. Oh, damn. All right, that was easy. That went really well. Let me see um uh [ __ ] I forgot. Let me check over here. We got to kill these guys. Okay, hit him. Asper cycle I don't need to know what that is. I know what that is. It's a combo. IT'S PRETTY [ __ ] OBVIOUS. ALL RIGHT, THAT WAS EASY. THIS should be the nexus, right? Doesn't seem like it. Well, let's try to see if there's a reaction with the container. Ooh, it don't work. Uh, no reaction. How did you know? Cuz nothing happened. Hmm. Idiot. Just intuition. The atmosphere here is no different from where we came from. Coco, you You get currency for looking at the tutorials? Do I? If I had even half of that, I wouldn't have to work just spend like a thousand dollars. I could even become an anomaly hunter earning maybe three times No, five times more Yeah, it's okay, guys. If you pick female, do you get a reverse harem? I don't know. Maybe you just get five of those furry guys. Yes, director. It's so dark in this tunnel. Oh my god. scared. Okay, so let's go enter the tunnel. We need to find the nexus. If we take too long, the space will change to superposition. Should I be hitting these? The space is changing again. I'm moving this. Like I can move it back and forth. Investigate. Look down. I didn't know you could do that. That's crazy. No signs of the nexus Okay, um Let's keep searching. Wow, what a game. What a game. Go to the end of the carriage. I want to fight a boss. Actually, like I I need to get some of the characters. Ooh, ooh, ooh, here we go. Yeah, I can smell it, too. That's a vending machine. Dodge before an attack. Okay, so dodge. Yeah, dodge and then critical dodge. Critical riposte can be performed uh by using basically that Here, let me move this over a little bit there. I think that make it a little bit better. Riposte can be used after triggering critical dodge can break an enemy Okay, got it. Coco What's he going to do? off about this place? It's so noisy. This thing's so mean. Can't think of it a rest. Oh, I see. It does more break damage. OKAY. [screaming] WHAT HIT ME? OOP, NO. NO. LEAVE GO OVER HERE. JESUS, what a little [ __ ] Like I got destroyed. What's your status? The oddities are getting tougher, but still no match for us. Wow. Looks like we're getting closer to the nexus. If you still can't nullify the anomaly after locking onto the nexus, try to contain it. Don't waste a second. Roger. Okay. So, where do I go now? I guess I'll go over here. My orders can't take it anymore. It's like a We're getting closer to the source of all It's like an AI hallucination. Crazy ass [ __ ] What are they doing? Wait, they're literally just I'm fighting I'm fighting an Oscar the Grouch. We heard some voices mumbling. It's getting clearer now. Okay, uh let me get them over to here. I have like a thing where like I I feel like I can't use my abilities until I can hit everybody. I'm going to hit all four of them, right? Yeah, I did. OKAY, GOOD. WATCH YOUR [ __ ] OKAY, SO I GET A HEALING ITEM, TOO. I won't need healing. I just don't take damage. What's this? It's going to be like a door, right? What the [ __ ] Don't tell me this is a puzzle. Please don't be a puzzle. I can feel it's different from the surroundings. Uh-oh. True. Yes. I'll assist you fully. So, interesting analogy. So, I don't have to do a puzzle, do I? She's not a goofball. She's a It's a ball Oh, it's a boss. Damn, already? It's actually hitting me. Okay, let's do it. Damn, this Okay, you can parry attack. This seems really simple. Understood. And I can swap to parry, too. I got hit by that cuz I'm a [ __ ] idiot. Oh, wait. Nope. Not so bad. Hold left click. Can I hold Damn, I really like getting hit by that, huh? I'm actually garbage. Okay, he's broken. So, I'm going to hit Now, he probably takes way more damage, Yeah, yeah, yeah. Damn, for like a first boss, this is actually it's got a lot of health. Wait, what? What the [ __ ] IS THIS? OKAY, SO I SHOULD SAVE THE SWAPS FOR WHENEVER HE'S GOING to do a red thing. Do I hit him with that? Hit the old Hopefully that'll interrupt the spell. Get the [ __ ] out of here. I think I might be the best at this game, honestly. I might be that guy. You're better than I? Oh, really? I feel like whenever these games first come out, it's the most interesting because that's whenever you can fight all like the hardest bosses with like low-level gear. And it's like you have to like Oh, wait. Yeah, you got to like play really well. Thought I would be better than everybody else? Well, I No, cuz I haven't spent a thousand dollars on the game yet. Yeah, I was waiting for that. So, wait, what? Does it This is like a It's like an evil realm, right? Didn't it just like kill a bunch of civilians, did it? So, what do we do? I think it's pretty cool boss. Uh-oh, she's getting mesmerized. It's been nullified. It hurt. Your praise. Wait, what? Maybe. Why? It sought an existence was a sincere compliment. You know you always get the guaranteed character after 90 pulls? I'll get it in 10. Yeah, I get it in 10. Trust me, like I'm I'm actually really good at these games. You handled the situation well. Mint, take him to Aoba later. Now, trust me. I don't know. Uh-oh. They're going to kill the cat girl? Wow. then this containment breach will count towards your performance. This game is next-gen gotcha, you'll see. I I don't I don't know how it works. I watched like a 15-minute video about the game. That was it. At least like to start out. We'll use it to contact you. Thank you for your help. Mint, let's go. All right, so am I able to play now? His instincts with anomalies is even stronger than in his record. No, she's vital to the game. Hope that won't cause us any trouble. Our director is still as rigid as ever. If you ask me, he might be just a little Man. special. At least for now, he is on our side, Um Yeah, maybe this really is the next generation. Wow. So, is this like your Is this like your government-mandated girlfriend? Your your [music] cat girl girlfriend? That's great. Yes. See, I never played [music] Grand Theft Auto, so I don't know what to expect. I have no idea. Is this a girl game? I don't know yet. It requires like Like in parrying, I mean, come on. Okay, so Oh, wait. Now I'm in the game. You can pull now. Oh, wait. Okay, so I can glide. A what Wait, wait. Warrant Warrant, what does warrant mean? Any illegal action in the city accumulates warrant value. When your warrant value reaches a certain threshold, you become wanted. While in a wanted state, some of the appraiser's actions will be restricted. The following actions in the city will increase your warrant: attacking pedestrians or vehicles, attacking law enforcement officer, forcibly taking other people's vehicles, damaging public property while driving, other actions that threaten city safety. Uh-oh. There's a few ways to bring your warrant value down. Lose the pursuing security officers by putting some distance between you and them, go back to your house, or you can eat special cookies. Oh, okay. Uh they The tasty cookie is a great way of pulling Officer Whiskers' attention away. Use it while wanted to significantly lower your wanted value. Getting caught by a security officer sends you to Harry Through Detention Facility. You can leave after serving detention time or paying a fine. Can I go in the water? I can. Can she swim? Or does she just die? No, she can swim. Okay, so you can swim around. Okay, what else can I All right, all right, so what happens if I just get in It says forcibly taking. So, what does forcibly taking mean? Does that mean that like Wait, what's this? What? Oracle Stone. I got to Well, I have to collect birds? I I guess like I guess I have a bird now. So, what about a bike? Can I steal a bike? Woah, wait. I was trying to see if they can run me over. Requisition? Oh, so I can I don't want to steal it cuz I think it's going to mess me up. So, can I go somewhere and just steal a car? I want to see if I can. Like I I want to find an unattended car. Do it? No, no, no. I'm I'm looking. Oh, another bird. Oh, we got two birds now. You know what that means? Me either. Oh, here's one. Hey. Hey, buddy. I can't steal this one. What about this one? I can't steal that one, either. [ __ ] Wait, I want to play as a girl. Actually, do you guys want the You guys probably want the girl, anyway. Enter the fluctu- woah, wait. Fluctuation zone. What does this mean? Uh approaching anomaly. Uh what is this here? Color change Okay, I'm just not going to go over there right now. Surely we're not gay. I just want a car, bro. I just want a car. I'm just I I think that like if I go down here, can I climb? Okay, you can climb. That's a level 12. Won't this kill me like super fast? Dude, I can't even do any damage to him. OH MY GOD. OKAY, I'M GOING TO I'M going to That guy's level 12. We don't [ __ ] with him at all. CD PS, yeah, true. Can I get them open? Oh, [ __ ] Woah. Damn, so I can go all the way around in this whole And this is all the city? I'm really feeling like I'm really feeling like I need to steal a car. I am. I'm really like I I don't want to steal a car, but I feel like I might have to. Just do a story? No, no, no. Here. I'm a I'm going to run for like 1 more minute. I'm going to see if we can find a an abandoned car that I can just sta- I can just key a voice the car. And if I can't do that, then I will steal a car. Oh, three birds. This is a big day for me. Is this one of those fake accident scams? Damn. Maybe Oh, oh, oh. Here we go. Here we go. Here [music] we go. Hey, get off my car. What just hopped on my car? Is this your car? Hey, get Did you follow her here? Hey, get off my car. You broke my windshield. You better pay for this. Uh heating up? No, no, no. No. No, no, no, no. Guys. Guys, guys. Guys, I Guys, it it's It's not what you think it is. It's not what you think it is, guys. I'm on I got I got to go this way. Okay, uh brake, handbrake, horn, comfort mode? What the hell is That's supposed to happen? I feel like that wasn't supposed to happen, right? Okay, so is there like a circle I have to get out of? I think I'm good now, right? Woah, wait. Is this Is this bad? Replication growth will never stop proliferating. Okay, I don't know how the [ __ ] this I'm just going to ignore it. So, am I still wa- I am. I'm still wanted. Okay, so horn? What happens if I if I Oops. Holy. Change car? No, I I don't want to get in trouble again. Okay, so I'm I'm trying to figure out what to [ __ ] idiot. You won't? No, no, no. I'm going to be all right. I'm going to be fine. I'm just trying to get an idea how this works. Can I pass this guy? Yeah, I can. Okay, that's fine. That's fine. It doesn't matter. You win some, you lose some. Tell me they don't let me Aw, man. Like come on, dude. I was I I was thinking I'd be able to. Why? Well, I just I I I don't know why I I I It was like for testing purposes. Okay, red light. Just going to ignore that. I feel like I'm actually a really good driver in this game, dude. This is I'm I'm really good. Like I'm running red lights, that This area is so big. You even know how to drive that? What? Uh-oh, there's police again. Okay, I'm trying to figure out like All right, all right. So, now I kind I kind of have an idea of like what I'm doing. So, take it out of comfort mode? Oh, no. I'm going even faster. I'm good. Look at me. Let me see. Okay, uh me go back around this way. And I'm almost at two stars. Okay, so we got to go Wait, can I go over the Golden Gate Bridge? Let me see if I can. So, what happens? No, no, no. Maybe I can. Oh, I got to go up there. I got I'll go up. I'll go up. It's got to be this way, right? And then I turn around. I got limited character in 20 pulse. I'm I'm not I'm not Let me focus on this right now. This is important. Man, like that was That was That was kind of their fault, honestly. That was not me. Okay, so can I go over the Can I go down the big bridge? You go on dates with the girls, too? We're going to do that. No, we're going to we're going to figure that out. We're going to get to the bottom of that. We're going to figure out how it works. But right now, I want to focus on this. Stealing an 86? I mean, this one can only go on 98 miles an hour. I feel like that's kind of slow, right? What a dumb ass, bro. He doesn't even know how to drive. Okay, I'm going to go this way. That's fine. That's fine. That's fine. I wanted to hit it. That was actually a a mistake. I didn't mean to do that. You need a faster whip. Think so? Okay, so I have to go up to there. So it seems like I am actually able to drive all the way across the bridge. Holy [ __ ] This is a big game. uh let me see. All right, it's the next turn over, right? It's got to be this one, right? Oh, this is it. This is it. Damn, so I can actually just drive all the way over here. We're gaming now, yeah. I didn't Honestly, I didn't expect this. I Where you come from? What's he doing trying to I'm trying to have fun. He's trying to mess me up. So you can explore the entire city. Avengers Tower is 60 miles an hour. No, it says it says 98. Wait. Wait, can I just go down this way? This looks like a path to nowhere. Uh well, invisible wall. It's got to be an invisible wall, right? Yeah, I can see All right, there's a texture change. It's I'm going to hit it right here. Watch. I knew it. I knew it. Okay. I I had to Truman Show my my way into understanding how big the game is. All right, let me go What What about this tower? Holy [ __ ] God damn, this this game is big. Okay, so what happens if I get arrested? I surrender. No next time. No, I I'm not resisting. Guys, I'm not resisting. Why are they killing me? I'm not resisting. I'm getting tired. I Now I'm in jail. They turned the body cams off and they shot me. They killed my cat girl. This is your cell. According to the Hethrow Detention Facility Code of Conduct, it is now lights out. Your priority tonight is to settle in and follow the rules. No moving around, no noise, get in bed and rest. During your detention, any misconduct will be recorded and may affect the length of your stay. I didn't do anything. I I didn't do nothing, man. What do you mean? Okay, so open. What is this? A diary? Escape method. Wait. Uh the path of redemption. Rest. If you're detained, you'll be released only after your detention period ends or all fines are paid. Wait, I'm actually in jail. Wait, I have to do facility labor. Any misconduct Wait wait. So I can even have Why are there newspapers pasted here? There's actually a hole in the wall. These bricks are underneath some loose too. It's hard to do with just my hands. I should cover this up right now. could find something with a bit more leverage later, like a spoon? Okay. What about this? Okay, so I have to go. All right, all right, all right, all right. So I can't leave. I can't leave cuz I'm in jail. Okay, I'm going to rest. And this is my life So this is my life now. I'm in I'm I'm a [ __ ] prisoner. So 6 days in the Wait, what? None of your business. Wait, I'm in jail for 6 days? For what? I didn't even do anything wrong. What do you need? Uh I want to pay my fine. Wait wait, let me do let me do some work. Work duties. Okay, the work available is cleaning and washing dishes. I'd like to do some cleaning. I have to clean [ __ ] off the wall? I just It's not It's not working. Well, it's clean. Why does it say it's not clean? Don't tell me I have to get every little spot. There's no way. It Switch nozzle? Oh wait But it still doesn't say target removal. The [ __ ] thing's clean. They're not paying me. Okay. Okay, red. How does this not count? 20%? Are you [ __ ] kidding me? Now I have to rinse it Oh wait. Wait a minute. You're telling me What is this? I don't know how to clean things, man. I don't know how this works. I'm not I'm not joking around. Like I literally just don't I don't know how to do this. I just put water on it, it's gone. Like This is Can I just go fight a boss? Wait, I got $1. We're going to clean this off. You know what? This is got to be karma for all the times I say like this is what they should do to people in jail. Man, this sucks. This sucks, man. Well, it's not done? Oh, there it is. Okay. So I've got one Oh my god, there's more [ __ ] on the ground. I'm jail maxing. I am. I'm going to put this away. I'm never going to commit another crime again in my life. I I'll never commit any more Guys, I'm a reformed citizen. I will never do this again. Surely? Missed a spot? No, I didn't. I I'm a I'm a great Wait it's not it's the bar is not going up anymore. I I'm a fine, upstanding citizen. Okay, okay, so work is over. Neverness to ever Yes, I know. That That's Is that how long my prison sentence is? Wait, why is it only men in prison? Wait. I don't know if I take the potato chips if I'm going to get in like a fight or something. I'm going to click on it. Okay, nothing happened to me. That's fine. Weekly What does this say here? Weekly Weekly felony? Wait, what? A bootleg manga? Wait what What is this here? What Where's my inventory? Can I click on it? I can't. Look at your own Can I Can I skip ahead? My hands are shaky. What are you laughing at? That's enough. I'm actually [ __ ] in jail. Do I have chest hair? No, never mind. This is Why is there a nice chair in there? Is this my life? Like I I'm just I'm just in jail. End lunch. Okay. I'm out in the prison yard now. Okay, guys. Everybody's just sitting around. And there's basketball. Of course there's basketball. Man. So You can escape with parkour? Oh, yeah, you're right. Yeah, can I just climb out of here? Oh, it doesn't let me. Okay, let me think. How can I get out of here? All right, so There. There. This They lube the walls. They don't. I'm trying to I'm trying to I'm trying to break out of jail. Find a spoon. Okay. Okay, that's a good idea. There's I got soap. We got We got soap. Okay, um drop it. You You can't. You can't drop it. Okay, let me look around and see what else is here. Play Oh, playing cards. Oh my god. Okay, a strong Wait. There's literally drugs here in the prison. Can't or won't? I Uh yes. He was Oh, wow, that's a really good item. 40% health. I'm just trying to figure this out. Okay, so I can't There's no See, I should have looked for a spoon in the uh in the that other area. The lunchroom. I didn't think of it. So, let me talk to this guy. If you're not clearing your head, I'd like to pay Dude. Can I say I'm All right, I'm sick. You're not feeling well. What's wrong? I have a headache, my stomach hurts, my legs hurt. Whoa, seriously? You've got a condition, get to the infirmary. I'm s- I thought they were going to just let me out. But the doctor won't even talk to me. Fainting prisoner. Are you faking an illness? So what? Mind yourself. Just draw the doctor's attention. You know why? I I got you. Don't rat me out. Oh my god. Okay, so what's in here? Oh, I stole disinfectant. [ __ ] Exit. Exit. Exit. Okay. This I I I I was already here. uh Okay. All right, we have to find a spoon, right? Where's Where's my spoon? Can I talk to her? Uh it's just your cooking smells amazing. Let me ask you, how's the food? It's perfect. I don't know where it is, man. I was trying to to to rizz up the the cafeteria lady. It didn't work. Okay, so End your yard time. Okay, so now Okay, now I'm in another part So, there's actually an entire jail sequence for this game. It's just Wait, I can go into other people's cells? Can I go into his cell? Spider. You came to the right person. All right, what stuff do you have? All right. All here? Okay, all right, so I can buy Oh, man. I can't buy anything. Jail merch? No, I I thought I'd be able to buy a spoon from him. Okay, so I've got to look and try to find a detention uniform, okay? I've got to figure out how to get out of jail. Um All I'm doing is stealing everybody's water bottles. Wait, what about this guy? Living fossil. Are you a Or wait, does that mean he's old? That guy looks as old as I am. Is he's just Wait, he's just telling this massive story. Jeez, what an [ __ ] These guys are dicks. Uh Or wait, oh oh oh What's this? Oh, this is my room. Okay, view. Okay, I've got to figure out how to get this spoon, man. Oh, man. I don't know where the [ __ ] it is. Would you like to appeal I might have to pay the Maybe I should pay the fine, guys. What do you think? Should I pay the fine to get out of jail? Wait, can you let me Can I bribe this guy? Sleep until tomorrow. I'm never stealing another car again in This is the biggest mistake I've ever made. Crime does not pay, guys. What do you need? Okay, I'm going to do some work and I'm going to do Okay, so I'm going to the cafeteria has got to be where the spoon is. This is just really, guys. I've I've been reduced to this. I I I I have to do the dishes and I I I have to do prison dishes. Wow, work over. Okay, where wait. No, no, no, I wanted to s- [ __ ] [snorts] Sh- [ __ ] I How the hell do I Or is this a spoon? People glance this way, so I'm just better not get spotted. I'm going to wait for her to walk away. I'm going to I'm going to wait for her to walk away. Got it. You stupid [ __ ] you didn't see me. Okay, all right, that was great. End lunch. Okay, so I've got I've got the spoon now. And now I get to leave. And how do I go back to my I want to go back to my set order. Who's crocodile? Got any spare soap? Mind if I have some. What do you need the soap for? When I got here, I didn't know how things worked. I don't want to go through that Wait wait a wait a minute. Wait a minute. What did he say about a nightmare with soap? When I was showering, my hands Wait. Okay, I I have to turn this off. Give me a minute. There's no way you actually have this in There's no way this is actually in the game. When I first got here, I didn't know how things worked. I was showering and my hand slipped and the soap went right down the drain. After that, I couldn't get my hands on a new bar for two whole weeks. I never want to go through that nightmare again. I can't relax unless I have at least five bars of soap on hand. Not right now. Now I Now I'm Okay, so I'm going to try to break out of jail. Just making small talk. I've got nothing else to say. Dude, the guards hate me in Yeah, they really don't like me, man. I don't know why. I didn't I Like I'm innocent. I didn't even do anything. So, we're going to wait for the guard to leave and then I'm going to break out. I got to wait for this guy to walk away. I'm going to go I'm going to do one more brick and I'm going to stop. Let me [music] stop. Excuse me. How long does it take for the guard to Okay, all right, three bricks at a time. Three bricks at a time, boys. Cover it? It is. Why did I have to steal that car? Why did I have to steal that [ __ ] car, man? I'm going to sleep again. This game should be mandatory in schools. No, okay. Three I have three more days in jail. Now I have to go So, Does it reset every time? I don't know. No, I don't want to do this. Yes, I don't I know I don't want to clean. I don't want to clean again. I'll do the the the the Okay, all right, let me focus again. I'm going to get another spoon. I'm going to get another I'm going to get another spoon. Got it. Got it. All right, see I just spammed I spammed through it. Get two spoons? Can I? That's a good idea. That's a good idea. Two spoons. Oh, it doesn't let me. There's only one spoon in the game. End lunch. This is [ __ ] brutal. This is awful this Dude, jail sucks. let me go. And now that I have Now Now I The box is not meant to be fun. I guess not. Okay, now Now I have another spoon and I should be able to do the rest of the bricks, right? I'll be able to do the rest of the bricks with this. So, it should be okay. Come on, turn around. Leave. Oh, I'm going crazy now. One more. One more. One more. Stop. I could do more. I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait. No, it's okay. Do you guys remember that this is like a Do you guys remember the main story quest? Do you remember back whenever I had there was a main story? I'm a two-person should get in the spork. I know. Maybe you can go back to the cafeteria after the spoon breaks, maybe. Okay, I'm going to wait. Okay, I'm All right, all right. All right, all right, let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Come on, please don't break. Please don't break. Please don't break. Please don't break. Please. Please. Please. Escape It says escape. Escape. I'm escape. I'm escape. But I can open again, right? Okay. Okay, so there's no way the bricks are back, right? There's like 0% chance the bricks are back. No, I'm I'm I'm getting out this time for sure. View? Okay. So, I'm going to go No, all right, maybe the bricks haven't respawned. Wait a second. Okay. Uh I want to do some work. Okay, I'm going to wash dishes. This is This is good, guys. This is This is amazing. Okay. Wait, I saw like there was a YouTube video a guy had like millions of of this funds. So, like I'm doing this for a like one Is these are like pennies, right? It's like nothing. I'm I'm not even making any [ __ ] money. You can can you can rob a bank? That's what I should do. I should rob a bank. End what? Wait, I can't even end lunch. I have I I literally have to sit here. Get a spoon? I don't need one. Uh it's it's already open. I don't I don't think I need a spoon. Just in case. Okay, that's smart. That's smart. I'll do it. Okay, here we go. Got it. got the spoon. Got the spoon. We're good. All right. And ending lunch. Okay, good. Now we have a bonus spoon. And is there any more soap? I I I'm trying to see maybe there's more soap that I can get for this guy. Okay, I have to I have to get out this time. I have to escape. So, let me go through here. When does the game This is the game. This is the game. This is it. This is the rest of my life playing this game. 8 day sentence incoming. Absolutely not. And also, I thought this I thought I could have my like my time pass faster. It says escape. [music] All right, it says escape. I'm going to I'm going to use it again. Come on. All right, here we go. We're not going to make any mistakes this time. We're not going to do anything wrong. There's two of these. And I'm just going to move like this. And then I don't know how to Right now. Right now. I'm about about to go right now. I'm about to go right now. Oh, no. Let's go over there maybe. Did I make it? I made it out the jail. And so now, wait. Well, how do I Well, I got to swim? Can I take the Let me see if I can take the boat. Can I I I can't I I can't This This is This is really bad, guys. I can't get back up. Escape the island? No, it's okay. I'm going to see if I can talk to this guy and he can let me use the boat. It says activate. Yo. See you, boys. Damn, bro. Must suck to be in jail, huh? Damn, that's just too bad. That's too bad. No questions asked. That's right. I wonder what happened Oh, no. I I don't want to fall off. I don't want to fall off. Okay, so how did you get your clothes back? Uh it was um [ __ ] I put my pocket I had my pocket. And so I took them out of my pocket. Got you. Time Is it time to start pulling? What do you guys think? Maybe I could do one more quest. Well, why don't I do one more quest? F3 No, relax. Relax. I I I press Z for first person. Damn, we really made it out there, huh? Like that was That was pretty bad for Press number two now? Okay. All right, there she is. Easy enough. Look down? I don't want to jump. I might fall off. That's crazy. How about that? Amazing game. What a game. What a great game. Control the walk. Okay, I don't know the mechanics. So I'm I can't believe I uh I mean, I was in jail for like an hour, Like I just spent an hour sitting there in jail. Okay, well, I guess that's uh that's Damn, bro. Can you Can you speed this up? Bro got jailed after landing in the city? Yeah, I Well, I wanted to drive around. I All I wanted to do was drive a car. That's all I want All I wanted was to be that guy driving around. And they just couldn't let They They couldn't bear to see me live. Is that too much to ask? Yes. All All the pain, yeah. The credits are supposed to be rolling during the boat ride? No, bro. Like I I don't even know where he's taking me. I'm going by that What What is [music] that? Like [ __ ] Is the Avengers tower? Damn, we really made a lot of power guys, huh? This Yeah, bro. It's freedom. It's I They put me in jail for a tweet. It's actually like stealing a car and running like 10 people over, but you know, it is what it is. I can't believe there's an entire There's an entire jail system to the Like I thought that like if I went to jail, I would just go to the I just talked to the guy or like spawn me outside the police station or something like that. Like I I I didn't expect there'd be There was like an entire like quest chain and everything for being in [ __ ] jail. Is this a gotcha open world? Yes, it is. You're going to repeat offender? I am I will never repeat offend until I have really good gear and I can just kill all the police officers in the game. And so like I I'll just kill all of them, right? Be easy. So I'm not worried about it. The system works. And then I And then after I kill all the police officers, I'll just pay to get uh I'll I'll pay the government to let me go. Okay, you guys remember See, this is where I was at. That's the scene of the crime right there. That's what That's where uh This boat's a 70-minute ride. Yeah, this game really This game doesn't give a [ __ ] about your time, bro. Like It does not give a [ __ ] It's like oh oh, you got sent to prison? Well, you shouldn't have committed a crime. You're going to You're going to sit there now for like an hour. It really punishes you for going to jail. It sure does. This is part of your punishment. You can teleport, but you didn't unlock it. So, I could have teleported [music] the entire I can teleport back to jail. How about that? Why doesn't show my car? I didn't unlock the teleport. Okay. Need to set up telephone. What are your thoughts on the game? Boys, do not commit crime. It's not worth it. You think it's worth it, it's not. It It's It's bad. Don't do the crime if you can't do the Can't do it. You're going to have to just drop me off at the beach. Drop me off at the beach, man. Now I'm going away from it. Just swim, I'll die. Because I'll run out of stamina in the middle of swimming. I know how these games work. No, I'll I'll I'll literally die and run out of stamina. You won't? I will. I know I will. It doesn't use stamina? Yeah, it does. I saw it use stamina whenever I was at the Why are you [ __ ] I It's using stamina, by the way. Right now, it's literally using stamina. I would not have made it. I would not have made it. I would not even come close to making it. Like I was like not even remotely close. Rage bait? No, I just I I just randomly hit the button on accident. It was It was actually an accident. I swear to god. It really was. All that to get another Yeah, bro, that was all of this the the only reason I did that was to get the other bird. So, okay, let me get back to the girl and then we'll do the gotcha. Does that sound good? I have to I I have to like juice the account, though. Time to rob a bank? Guys, I just got done being in jail. Okay? Grab a car? Absolutely [ __ ] not. Absolutely [ __ ] not. I'm going to walk over there. I I can't afford a car. I'm not going to be a repeat offender. I've already been arrested once. You're moving kind of slow, bro. Stop. You're You're making me want to do I have to Listen. If you can't afford a car, you can't just go around stealing cars. That's not That's not the way the world works. He didn't even stop. WOAH! WOAH! THE [ __ ] WAS THAT? What the [ __ ] bro? Like So, can I go like theoretically, can I go on top of this building? I actually can. The wind's just right. Jesus, look at this stupid little thing I got. Spooderman? Yeah. I don't know. This There's probably some of them you can go in, some you can't. I don't know. Okay, let's let me figure out summon T to Wait, what does T do? T doesn't do anything. I I can't even do anything with that at all. It's not stealing, we're just borrowing from innocent people. No. No, you're not going to try to mess with the police officer. How about let's don't mess with the police officer. It seems like a really good idea. That's amazing. Wow. That's Wow. He stole a bike? Apparently not. let me see if this is going to Wait, don't tell me it's going to be a [ __ ] tr- Episode 1, good business, better treasure. Can you go in these places? You can go in some of them. Okay, I can't st- It's a red item. I can't steal that. Crazy cat. Okay, not not quite, guys. Yeah, not quite. Food first. Thanks in advance. Who's she talking to? Is she trying to talk to me? Go to Hakugu Square. I didn't expect Wait, is she homeless? I can't do anything. Never mind. Yeah, this place is really big. Oh, it's like It looks like the Tesla logo. Does that tower have some sort of monitoring function? Yeah, it's a surveillance tower. Wait, so there's a giant obelisk? There's a giant obelisk that just watches everything you do. And that's like just normal here. What do you want, little idiot? Little Yeah, true. You know what? You guys ready to spend some money? Is it time? I want to see if I can do it. Is it ready? Okay, give me a minute. I got to finish this. I would say that this is one of the most For how thin she is, that is outrageous. It's peak, of course. Maybe it's best not to tell her all the other girls? Bro, they exist, I don't know. Let me tell you. I know. I follow all of them on on Instagram. I'm fully aware of that. Check the tower. Wait a minute. Let me guess, this is the teleporter? So, if I had clicked this, I wouldn't have had to take the boat ride? Uh it's like red and [ __ ] That's kind of bad, right? I feel like that's like really bad. It's got to be really bad. Area unlocked. Okay, anomaly commission unlocked. Press to open the anomaly commission. Backstreet Boxer Rhythm What the [ __ ] is all of this? Oh my [ __ ] god. Okay, so All right, Oh my no. Oh no. Okay, okay, okay. High risk commit Silent Oh this is like a boss level 20 Okay, all right, all right. There's a lot of [ __ ] to do. Wait, can I pet dog? It does look lively. Is A Bone busy as well? Wait, wait, wait. Can I do this to the cement? This is great, guys. I've been waiting on this. This is perfect. Place. Okay, so can I pet it? All right, so next thing I should even the NPCs. You just got baddies walking around like it's nothing. This alley looks pretty creepy. A Bone's revenue is only enough to cover renting a Grumble's storefront on Hoko Street. Caleb said to spend money, so start pulling. Okay, after the cinematic we're going to start pulling. It means a store on this corner. All right, I'm I'm ready. I'm ready. Let's do it. Just walking here makes me want to leave as soon as possible. A Bone's business isn't This is the place It's kind of place you go down you get robbed, right? So the shop relies on accepting anomaly commissions from the city. It's tough to make a living in a big city. Oh, true. Look at that. What about that big red thing that's there? Don't worry, Coco. With me around, Nanaly and the others will definitely look after you. You can clean Mint's ears? Oh no. How? Nanaly, I promised to bring her tail back last time. I left it in the car. Oh, wait, what what car? to come back. We'll go back and get it. But but it will delay safely guiding you to A Bone. I'll bring it back from the bureau later. Oh my god. I'll go to A Bone first. You can go get [music] your stuff. Yeah. Don't worry. I'll get there safely. That's great. I'll be right back. And you are the most understanding person in the whole wide world, Coco. Shut up, [ __ ] SHUT UP, [ __ ] OKAY, give me a minute. So let me look All right, so character fair. What is fair? Scarborough I automatically know what this is. Okay. So we've got strange NTE strange encounters. I don't do vague requests. Okay. So you've got this character here. All right, that's pretty good. And then No, okay, next let's see here. Recipient confirmed. Facts at work. Clarity. Obsession. Dissolution. Dude, her ash Oh my god. Okay, next. Gaze is the child of love. I like the way you look at me. [laughter] Okay, so All right, so there's that that sound that sounds good. And then this is the new character. This is the important As long as I'm watching your back, you won't have to worry about a thing. It's another cat girl. That's amazing. Thank god. Okay, so we have Oh, wait, where are these other ones? Edgar It's got looks like a [ __ ] loser. Next. Hey, did you need me? Greetings to you. And then you have just a normal the normal guy. Okay, so how do I spend money in the game? Okay, so we have hot picks and this is obviously Um okay, gift center. Okay, this is the one It says $68,000. $68 million $6.8 million. Okay, prime picks. I'm trying to figure out how to even spend money in the game. Like okay, arc shop. Okay, so how Wait, I can give them different outfits? As long as I'm watching your back, you won't have to worry about a thing. Wait, they have different I don't know What about Mint's outfit? picking up. So all You have to buy these. That's not a surprise. Okay, next. Okay, we've got these three outfits. All right, so what about Don't care. Okay. You're sharing with me. Yum. Oh, they have all these other Oh my god. Look at all these other characters. Okay, what about this one? Jesus, man. Okay, next. requests. All right, what about This is like our casual outfit. Oh, wow. Do you want to hang out? Oh my god. I'm free after work. What a What a game. All right, let me go and look at Who calls upon the name of Han-Yolo? I'm here. So these ones don't have Anomalies available. Okay, no but They don't care about her. Who gives a [ __ ] about her? Okay, and so All right, we got these. I thought it's Get so musings. Okay, fair exchange. Okay, this is some sort of reward. This is another reward. Okay, so this is probably for the gotcha pulls. This is probably for some sort of game play and this is probably for some other sort of like third-party system. And this This is where you spend the money. Okay, this is where we spend the money, guys. Rift crystal. Give me a minute, guys. One of the worst things that's happened with playing these games is that I actually know all of my details without even having to look at it. I do. I don't even have to look at it. I can do the entire thing by myself. Caleb is so proud. Yes, I'm doing this. This is I want you to understand. This is me engaging in financial advice. Okay, this is what I had a financial advisor tell me you need to spend more money. So whenever I'm spending money I'm doing this on purpose. So how many of these can I do before it shuts me off? I'm going to do the $50 one. And Okay, so we're at $250. All right, so Rich told me that one of the ways that you can get around your bank locking your account is to make different like types of purchases. So I'm going to do another $100. We're going to spend another $100. Is the game even I don't know. We haven't played Okay, so All right, all right, that's three. And I haven't had a single thing. Okay, good. Oh, guys, it's only $350. Okay, relax. I don't know if it's good or not. I have no idea. Okay, I was Yeah, I was locked in jail for an hour and then I was on a boat for 20 minutes and then I forgot what happened after that. All right, so that's All right, I think that's a good amount, right? Okay, I've spent $450. Which is actually the equivalent of $600. We spent $600 on this [ __ ] game. Let me make sure it's not showing anything. Double it? I'm not going to double it. So, how does this work? So, I I can get an event. Okay, this is an event bonus. I get Phoenix kick. What is this? Want to join the amazing Kaluchis? No. No, I do not. Oh, I get a car? Oh, that's cool. Okay, go to blue dice and roll. Well, it says get an A car No, no, no, no, no, bro, like I No, no, no, no. Get one S class after Okay, I'm going to lock in the I'm going to do this one and then I'm going to do the other one. I I'm going to do one and then the other I start with one, then I go to the other Check the mail. Okay. Uh mail. That's mall. They got Yeah, it's confusing. Uh NTE launch live I didn't watch it. I did pre-register, to be fair. Great, I got that. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Thank god. Thank god, I got it. All right. Let's do it. All right, guys. I've got I've got my thing. I'm going to do the I'm going to do the pulls right now. 30 pulls on standard. Wow, they give you 30 pulls just for starting. God damn. God damn, that's a lot of pulls. All right, let's do it. Ooh. It's time to become a champion. It's time to be a winner. Let's do this. What the [ __ ] is this? Consume fabricated dice or solid dice to gain movement points and then journey together tile. Okay, so I want to go to that. A chest Oh, god. Oh, no. Oh, I got to figure this out. Okay, give me a minute. Let me figure I thought I just said click a button. Okay, give me a minute. I got to figure this out. I I I It's not I feel like I've wasted money, right? It's a casino. What a surprise. two warp pieces. Okay, I'm not going to read any of this. So, where's the good one? But, she I want her, right? Yeah, I I I want to get her Oh, here. Oh, I can get a shirt, too? Okay, I'm going to roll 10. Five. Real me Isn't this the one that called me Edgar? Hello, I'm Edgar. Oh, god. for the anomaly hunter position. Oh, jeez, Edgar. I don't want Edgar. I don't want him. Six. No way. Go back. Go back. Go back. Go up. No. One. This is [ __ ] Catch up with three [music] dice rolls. The resting guardians When you move to their tile, you will awaken the guard Whatever. I I rolled a It's over. It's over. I'm not going to get it. I hate this game. Six. Okay. Yellow, right? And I got Okay, that's This is such bull All right. Let's do it again. Come on. All right, 30. Four. All right, I have to make it to here. Ooh, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait a minute. What happened? What is that? Oh, [ __ ] Looking for me? Mitch here. Man, how about that? No, I want to see if I'm going to get Okay, okay, I'm going to get right there. Two. No, no, no, no, I I need I need it Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. No, I This is [ __ ] ridiculous. This is so [ __ ] ridic I got a yellow. Okay, good. Come on, please. Why do they have to make this so hard? They made this game [music] so hard, bro, like Who's this? Who did I get? OSV Adler. Dude, this is the kind of guy This is the kind of guy Nobody plays this guy. No, nobody gives a [ __ ] Adler? Sounds like a teacher's name. All right, so I got three I got three A's. That's pretty good, isn't it? Three. Don't tell me it's [ __ ] it it's this stupid kid again. I don't want this stupid kid again. I'm going to max out Edgar. I'm going to get I'm going to I'm going to get a full a full six-star Edgar. Oh, are you kidding me? It's rigged I I think it's rigged, man. It's got to be [ __ ] rigged. Okay. All right, so now All right, you're going to get it this time, aren't you? That's That's two. Roll a six. I'm not getting him. It doesn't I'm not I'm not getting I'm not getting him. I swear to god. This is [ __ ] up. This is really This is really [ __ ] up, guys. Wasn't it like this in Tower of Fantasy? I got super lucky in Tower Fan I need I I need to roll a two. I need to roll a two, right? Okay, that's great. It's great. Let me get roll a one Okay, that's a yellow. Yeah, I think yellows are good, right? This is [music] Dude, this is [ __ ] brutal, man. A, okay, what's this? No, I don't want you. I don't want Wait, didn't I get him from Wait, I got him from this Wait, I landed in the same place. Okay, this time I'm going to get it. This time I'm going to get it right now. Here we go. We're going to get it. We're going to get this. It's It's going to happen right now. I don't understand. Neither do I, but I think if I roll a one, I get this character. I'm going to do roll one. I can't [ __ ] believe this. New car? No, you were going to get that anyway. It doesn't Okay, so now what? You're talking about the pink bozo car? Shut up. It's not a bozo car. Okay, am I going to spawn the the thing again? What? I I didn't even spawn it. Change the speed to 2x? Let me just [ __ ] Let me just [ __ ] play the game, okay? Okay, I I need to roll like Okay, now I need to roll like a five. I have to roll a five right now. Okay, I need to roll a four right now. I need to I need to roll a one. I need to roll a one right now. I Why do I keep getting him? Roll a one. It's a five. Oh, I got I got an extra roll. That's good, right? Okay, I got S-rank dice. Okay, that's I I think that's good, right? Come on, roll a six. Roll a six. Hit a six. Hit a six. I don't know I I I Okay, here we go. All right, I need to roll a four [music] right now. I need a four. I need a two. I need a two right now. I need to roll a two. I have Guys, this hurts so bad. This is so brutal, man. How many pulls do I have now? How many do I have left? I I I Okay, triggers aboard modification roll. Okay, so now I'm going to I'm going to have to modify the whole board. No, no, no, guys. This is It's fine. I'm good at these kinds of games, by the way. No, this is I No, I'm good at gotcha This is a This is a board game. I I I don't know how to play but I can't play board I'm bad at board games. Okay, give me a one. [ __ ] you. [ __ ] you. You didn't give me a one. This is ridicu Okay, I got another dice at least, right? I mean, it's not so bad. I am I'm going to get it this time. I'm going to get the chupacabra. All right, you're going to roll We're going to roll a six. A six right now. You're rolling a six right now. Something strange happened. I actually hit hard pity or I I hit soft pity. This is This is so sad. This is so sad, bro, like If I I [ __ ] You're going to give it to me. You're going to [ __ ] give it to me. Yes! [laughter] Yes! I knew I was going to get IT, GUYS. I'M THAT GUY. WOW. I'M A CHAMPION. We're collecting We're collecting them all. There you only It was only $500 Natalie. Who the [ __ ] is Natalie? We got it. And what She has different outfits, too, right? Well, then so are outfits. I don't know if it shows that. Well, anyway, all right, let me let me Easiest game of your life. Okay, so and then Oh, it went back. Okay, I'm going to do one more I'm going to do one more and see if I'm going to get it. I'm going to do one more. I'm going to go back to standard bet. All right, we're going to do two more. We're going to do two more. We're going to see if we're going to get it. We're going to do three more. That's it. Three more and then we're done. Come on, roll roll me a two. Woah, wait, what happens if I Does it Do I go on? It does not. Okay, so all right, what up? [ __ ] man. Okay, let me go. All right, strange So, what happens if I spend on this one? Swap banners? Shut up. Number one, shut up. All right. And now I get this? What is this? Claim? It's a glider? What should we do today? Oh my god. Okay. Let me do this one. All right, next next No, no, no, no. Okay, let me look. I don't want that. Wait, well, then how do I get the guys? Wait, well, where are the guys? Oh Oh, it says S character. Okay, I got Oh, it's 20% off. Are you okay? No. first meeting, why don't we take a photo together? All right. She's the best support? No, why? The first one's always a one. It's scripted. Except for whenever I need it to be a Okay, I'm hitting characters now. What's this? Oh, this is that girl they didn't have any outfits on. Yeah, this is the one they No, no, you you know she's bad. Would you like to join the game? character they don't even have any outfits for her, she's probably awful, bro. She's probably terrible. Healer? Obviously it's a girl. All right, I need to roll a two [music] This is crazy. This is really Are you a This is actually like this [music] is unbelievable I'm speeding it up now. Looking for me? Oh my god. Mins here. Mins here. That's that's [ __ ] that's so great. I'm so happy. Okay, here we go. Here we go. We're going to get it right now. We're going to get it right now, guys. Please, just a two. Just roll a two. Just roll a two right now. [ __ ] it. I don't want to see it. That's [ __ ] that's a [ __ ] waste. This is such a [ __ ] waste, bro. Like I I Five dice. Holy [ __ ] bro. We are balling. I get 30 What are these like these things I don't even know what the hell those are. Lost piece. Damn it, bro. Like All right. All right. That was actually pretty good. I do not give a [ __ ] Wait a minute. I got an S. That means I That means I [ __ ] I was off by one. That means I was off by one. Go to the shop, you'll see. I know I understand. I understand how it works. It's pretty obvious how it works. Look, watch watch watch watch watch three two two It's going to be two right here. This is where I get it. This is where I get it right now. I have to roll a one. I I I don't know what to say. I really I I don't know what to say, guys. Like it's just It's just such [ __ ] [ __ ] bro. Like I I don't know how this happens to me. Okay, we're going to get this one, Maybe I can get this one. Please let me just get this one. Please let me get this one. I need this one. I deserve this. I deserve this. [music] Please. I got another [ __ ] Edgar. Okay, at least we get her. She And I got [ __ ] again. How is this happening to me? Please, just give me the S-tier character. Please, but now I'm out of I'm out of spins. Okay. I have to get it now, right? Like I have to get this. Two. Just roll a two. Just roll a two. Just roll a two. Roll a two. Roll Come on, another one. I don't care about that. Just roll a Come on, please. All right. All right. I need another I need another four. I need a four. I need a four. I got a five. Ugh. Okay, I need a five. I got a six. I got a six. How is this happening to me? Okay, I need a I need a I need a one. I need a one. Give me a Guys. This is ridiculous. I'm actually It's [ __ ] There's no way this dice isn't rigged. There's no way. Like I'm sorry. You've been identified as So, do you think it's because I spent $450 that it knows that it's like, "Okay, we'll just don't give it to him. He's just going to keep putting money into it until he gets it anyway. It doesn't matter." This is outrageous. It's [ __ ] scripted. Oh, really? I had no idea. This that that's crazy. What a surprise. Okay, I'm going to do one. I'm going to do one pull. I'm going to roll a three, okay? This has got to be rigged, man. It has to be rigged. It has to be rigged. Like I I I have seven more and then I'm going to hit hard pity. I'm at 83 out of 90. 84. Now I have to roll a two. I have to roll a two now. I I need to roll a two. There's dude. I This is It it I I I've This has to be Look, but I know it's like a like How? How is this possible? You thought the jail was karma? Yeah, is this cuz it put me in Okay, I need to roll a five. I have to roll a five right now. Okay, guys? I need to roll a five. I need to roll a four. Guys, I have to roll a four right now. I need to roll a four. Guys, this is really bad. This is really, really, really bad. Like, where am I at now? I'm at 87. Now, I need to roll a four. I have to roll a four again. How much is it It's like a dollar It's like I don't know. A dollar, two dollars, I don't know. What's the story in this game? You go to jail and then you lose all your money on gambling. Let's roll the four. Here we go. Let's get it. Give me the four. There's no way, right? There's no way I roll a six There's There's a one in six chance that I that that I actually get it. Was Diablo more Come on, please. Just give me the one. [groaning] Hey, I look away [music] for one moment and you're giving me trouble again. [panting] This stupid What is this one? Oh, guys. Okay, I'm going to make up for it. I'm going to get another one. And I'm going to get to the I'm going to get to it right now. I'm going to roll another two. I'm going to about I'm I'm fixing about to get it. I'm fixing to be about to get it. Watch. I'm about to get it right. This is, guys. There's something wrong. I'm not going to pick a character yet. I'm not. That's not So, people say, "Oh, you should pick a character." I'm not going to do that cuz I'm not Number one, I'm not [ __ ] So, I'm not going to do it. The logical solution to how to approach a standard banner selector is to pull until you get every other character except for the one that you're missing, and then you use the selector on that remaining character. Now, you have to spend about $2,000 to be able to do this, but you have to spend That's like a way of saving money, right? That's the logical way to do it. That's how That's how you're supposed to do this. That's how it makes sense. Everybody knows this. We all know we we know how this works, right, guys? Let me I'm going to get around the board. Wait, I got it. Oh oh oh, I got the thing. Okay. Now, we know how to beat the game but No, no, no. No, no. Trust me. Here we go. Watch. This is why I hate I hate board games. I [ __ ] hate I I hate board games. I hate them so much. Like I I hated Monopoly. I hated Risk. I hate every [ __ ] board game. I hate every [ __ ] board game there is, okay? Chess is fun? I I No. No, I keep getting these Here to do my [music] job. Just really I mean, can it get worse? I don't know if it can get any worse than this, guys. Like, it's just Oh my god, I missed it again, bro. Like You sold your soul, bro. I wish If I had If I had sold my soul, I would have got one of those. [ __ ] that. Is that good? What what what [music] What do I do with that? What what Where's the Scarborough Fair? The [ __ ] is that? Fair? Wait, how how does this work? Mall? That's like nothing. That That's that I got 16? How's that an S That's not an S rank. That's like a B. Yeah, no no no. I understand that I had more, but that's because you get some for doing every pull. Like, Wuthering Waves has the same thing. I know I know how this [ __ ] Okay? Trust me. Like, I understand this. Oh my god, bro. What is happening to me? How do you do this? Hard pity again this time? No. No, this is going to be different. Wrong banner? It's not the wrong banner. The game functions differently. Th- This is a different functioning I I didn't even realize I missed it Okay, we've hit hard pity again. Two. I need a two. I got a four. All right, we're on the hard pity board I'm on the hard pity board another time. That's not what I wanted. That's not what I [ __ ] wanted, bro. Like, that's not what I want I I need a I need a five. I need another five. I need a four. I need a [ __ ] four. Give me a [ __ ] four. Thank god. Yes. Yes. Yes. That's what I'm [ __ ] talking about, boys. Let's go. Death and design. Oh my god. That is me. Jesus, guys. Worst character? Wait, what? There's no way that's true. That That's all That's [ __ ] That That there's no way that's true at all. [ __ ] piece of [ __ ] God [ __ ] damn it, bro. Like three out of three hard pity. I just Why am I not Why do I not get lucky, bro? Like I don't understand. Like there's These dice are rigged. They're rigged. I know they're rigged. You have a jail debuff? I I think I must have a jail debuff. You're right. Okay. All right, let's go. Please. Please. Jesus, dude. I have to I [ __ ] I missed it. [ __ ] missed it again. God damn it. Great, I get that stupid little fluffy thing. I I I hate him. Great. That's It's like the biggest fake out ever. Like every single time I get that thing I get that thing but I don't get the good one. You're kind of ass at it? I know. Four? It's actually crazy that this happened. It's really It's honestly impressive that this is happening to me. Like I I don't I don't This is See, this new system I'm not ready for this new system, man. Like I I can't handle this new system. This is like revenge for Tower of Fantasy. I don't know what to I I don't know what to Dude, it has to be rigged. There's no way, dude. How is this possible? I don't want you. Get out of my life. I've just I'm being defeated. This is crazy. I'm out I'm going to I'm going to run out of rolls soon. I am. I'm going to run out of rolls. I got it. Nice. Okay. That was 70. Payton, elite courier of starry [music] express at your service. Nice. We got a All right. All right, we got one. First ever non-pity. No, that was a pity. It was because I hit 70. I'm going to do one more. I'm going to do one more. I think I have to go way down. I have to I have to go way down. Like I've been I've been defeated. This is luck and strategy come Don't tell me I'm just kidding. This is [ __ ] brutal, man. Don't quit. I have to lay down, bro. Like I have to lay down. This is This is rough. You have a free S pick? I'm not going to pick one yet. I'll probably I might play more of this game tomorrow. I'll probably I would do the story on stream, like I think people just want to watch the game, and so like the stories usually take up I'll play it off stream and then I'll show you guys hopefully some more of the uh of the the further gameplay, right? Show us who the hottest girl is. I think Okay, who's the hottest girl? day. [sighs and gasps] Let me Let me How do I do that? It's the outfits, right? I can do that. Okay. Want to join the amazing [music] Kaluchis? So, I would say It might be her. Gaze is the child Who calls upon the name of Han? Is there anywhere you want to go? I'm ready. Pleasure working with you. Mayon. Mayon, I I think that for me It's probably Oh, man. Like I It might be her I I don't know, man. I have to really think about it. I keep thinking her name is Milk. Oh my god. Okay, look. Look, we What a day. What a crazy day. Close enough. Yeah, close enough. Um so, it's Edgar It's definitely not Edgar. The paperwork you need is clarity. Okay. this one's also ridiculously hot. Like I Change the outfit. I mean, she [music] has like wind's picking up. Um I mean, this is definitely a better level 10 mint bond. How do I How do I Wait, feature a lot? What do you mean feature a lot? That one's free? How do you make a bond with her? You have to date her? Right. That's amazing. We're going to have to So, that means I have to play this game all all all night tonight, so I can start the stream tomorrow with her in my apartment. That's what I I have to I have to speed run the game, so I can do that. That's what I I I I have to do this. Like you have something else to do? I don't. I beat the Vampire Survivors uh I I beat the game I beat all the levels. I beat it last night. Like I I And by the way, whenever I say I beat it, I mean I blew it completely the [ __ ] out. Like I totally blew it the [ __ ] out. It's crazy. Like I really am that guy. It's 1 hour. Okay. Is it good Is the game good? I think. What are you going to tip your fedora? Don't go home. Go back where? I was drawing some meat. That was all the food I had. Jesus Christ. God damn, man. He has massive aura. [music] I think he's even got his own gravitational field. So, I guess this is supposed to be set in America. What about Diablo 4? [music] I tried to play it again yesterday. And just, you know, get into it again. And I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I think it I think the game sucks. I do. I thought I think it sucks. Like I I just Maybe maybe I'll play it again. But it just didn't excite me. It didn't get me into it. Right? I mean, like maybe I I don't know. That's just me. Maybe I have Final Fantasy expansion jar? No, maybe I'll look at it tomorrow. Gacha games are ironically better game than Diablo 4. I think that a lot of these games are Like I think that the main complaint that people have with these games is that they have like pay-to-win elements. Like I don't think I think most people recognize that the games like at a core are actually pretty good. It's just that, you know, you have to spend money in the game in order to like achieve things. And you don't even really need to do that. It's just like heavily incentivized, right? You got another gacha game, but yeah, sure. Is pay-to-win that bad here? Well, pay-to-win is always going to give you an advantage. Like these are Like gacha games, it's it's a very weird thing with these games because like at a base level, the games play very well. And I think that they have decent you know, like systems, etc. But the problem is that I don't know. It's it's it's just complicated. What about…

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