Setting the record straight about kids!

[Music] oh yes sorry that sun is blessing this video look at this look at that lens flare come here come to the rescue best YouTuber in the world here I know how to film videos good quality I've been a dad now for a year and a half and I thought I want to share my Infinite Wisdom the thing is when you become a parent you're sort of forced to become an expert no matter if you're qualified or not you have no choice learn everything there is to know and people always ask me questions about B what it's like to be a dad and I thought okay here we go I make video so I asked you guys on YouTube and the most pressing question the number one thing people wanted to answer when will be host meme review as soon as he can speak as soon as he knows what a meme is I guarantee you when is B going to conquer Norway this is good this is good questions this is actually why I wanted to make this video uh first we will have to infiltrate Stockholm City cast out the bernad Dos rule be as king of Sweden manipulate people suddenly through jokes that will then become real like I'm doing now or am I honest answer just walk just walk into Norway what are they going to do they'll be like hey you cannot come here and like shut the [ __ ] they be like oh sorry bro sorry about that oil now oh sorry here you go what am I going to do fight back I'm Norway as always I'm super proud to sponsor items I actually use and Sy I'm a huge fan Sy is an eim server is basically like a SIM card but electronically why is this not a thing already I mean it is now a few weeks ago I went to travel in Switzerland for me from Japan it's a long trip the last thing I want to do after going through customs getting my luggage everyone's tired I don't want to stand in line to to sign up to get a Wi-Fi dongle write down my info hey you have to return it to this place at this time otherwise we're going to kill you I hate it a lot of times I don't even go for the Wi-Fi because I'm like I don't want to standing line I'll 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honestly this is the most asked question I never get this question to stop I feel like I answer it a million times even my mom asked me and I'm like Mom we I've told you this this is it fix do you think it will be challenging for be to learn foreign languages my child struggle with speech how are you planning to navigate raising be in multilingual environment again as a parent you're forced to learn everything I don't know the what the best method is but uh I think be is not the only child in the world with parents that speak different languages usually what people do and that is proven to work is that I'll speak Swedish to be might say we speak Italian to be maybe we'll speak English together at some points then he can learn Japanese hopefully in school I don't know but I think right now people are asking like he's still very young right now he we're just trying to make him learn a couple of words here and there you know what's your idea on iPad kids and Tech kids how will you control be's Tech usage once he grows up it's kind of freaky how kids are so attracted to screens it's like they're hypnotized they're m IED I mean here I am looking at screens 95% of the time in my day but it's just not it feels weird when you're looking at a child doing it you're like no stop that stop looking at it I I don't really have strong opinions about screen times but I definitely we try to avoid as much as possible but I mean if be is really fuzzy we're at a restaurant and maybe we just want to eat our food for 5 minutes cuz it's too difficult yeah I think that's okay but I think to use it as a subsidy of just like instead of looking after him or engaging with him I think that's I don't know some people you got to do what you got to do as a parent though so I don't want to judge other people or feel like I'm like no never I hate the idea of a kids having their own technology like that just seems crazy to me they can play with toys kids should play with toys it worked for me I had a helicopter it was sick it went that's how helicopter sounded like according to myself as a child of course and now as an adult so here's another question do you let be watch cocomelon the answer is genuinely no I think it's really shitty animation if you have to let your kids watch something there are so many more productive and better things out there and I know the whole Coco melon feudo whatever it's like a one-sided me it was a joke mainly but I genuinely think it's really bad kids content and they should not be watching it sorry COC melon for for being so real will you teach be how to play Minecraft now this is the real stuff of course of course yes of course one thing I realized as a parent is that it's very easy to have opinions about kids if you haven't experienced any trouble with them or had one for that matter it's very easy to be principal and be like no a child should never play video games for more than 15 seconds there a very elaborate answer to this question I realized I think what I was getting at is that I'm cool with the I can't wait to play games with be I do think what I would do as a parent is teaching uh balance I think that's very important to enjoy many different things not just spend your entire day play video games I think that's bad as a child and I think that's bad as an adult uh there's more to life and you enjoy things more if you separate them what is the coolest thing be has done don't like bej has done a lot of cool things few weeks ago he learned how to high five that was very cool honestly like when you have your kid and it's born it can't do anything it's completely useless but eventually it grows and you learn and it changes and adapts and it's amazing to see it in front of you like going from not knowing anything to all of the sudden you know it can eat B can eat food on it own and now he's starting to use a fork and just I know that's like every kid will go through that development but when you see your own child do it it's just an incredible thing like who what I'm so proud of you for being able to do that even though yeah I don't know I wrote about this actually in a newsletter that me and Maria have where it's like part of the joy of having a child it's just like anything new he does you're so mesmerized by it's such an incredible thing to see genuinely even today like he he was copying me cuz I was blowing on him to make fun of him a little bit like and then he starts going it's so cute and he's never done it before it's so much fun uh where do you see yourself in 5 to 10 years from now still in Japan still doing YouTube so long as you're enjoying Felix please never stop your presence is wonderful influenced on this community and seeing you grow for thank you love you thank you for the nice comment I really struggle with this so much for the past couple months I've had major anxiety over this it's just been going looping in my head like I have to think ahead now like I have a child I have to think ahead like okay what are we going to do like are we going to say are we going to move back are we going to what's better for be what's better for me what's better for my family what makes more sense like it's doesn't really make sense to live in Japan like but we love it here and I like it's been driving me crazy I'm not going to lie like it's been really stressful but I think I finally just let it go I don't need to think 10 years ahead I've never done that in my life 20 years later okay here's the question I don't know do you do anyone know that life is way too complicated to think like that I think it's good to have a plan obviously but I think it was genuinely just stressing me out and not anything productive coming out of it and I think for now Japan is wonderful for be people are so loving and warm to be me and my say I love it here everything's great why why complicate it why overthink it you know that's at least what I need to do how do you feel like your relationship with M that changed since having be it definitely changes your relationship when you have a child job all of a sudden you have to manage this entirely new routine and that's taken over your entire life and it's a scary time which makes it stressful and all these things together it makes it really difficult to navigate and I think for a while especially in the beginning I did not really enjoy the beginning of having a baby cuz there was not that much to do a lot of early parents describe this feeling of like before you find your footing you're almost like roommates it's like okay now it's your turn now is your turn he would be awake so much during the night that we would have to like split our hours and like we we saw each other so the the least we've ever done because of it it's like we're living in different time zones uh so I think that was really hard but I now that be is becoming more of a boy it's just wonderful and we are both so incredibly proud of ban and now we have this amazing thing that we have together and we're sharing and so much to look forward in the future it's just like made us into to a family and that's a wonderful wonderful thing I love it who usually gets up to 3:00 a.m. to attend to be usually his mom try my best okay honestly like it depends but um we switch back and forth so if some someone has to do the night then that person gets to sleep in and so it kind of balanced out but yeah Mama usually what's it like developing your bond with be from when he was an infant to now yeah I kind of talked about it already like how a lot of parents love the infant face they see it as like a mini Holly and I'm like did we had experience the same thing like when it was the worst it was super stressful every baby's different obviously so I think that's probably ties into it but yeah some people say that the infant station is like yeah we just watch TV we just relax we just stay at home I'm so glad that now I can finally do stuff with be I think that's when our bond grows like we have a day a week now we're me and be do things together we go out we have lunch together I chat with him while we're out like it's a like hanging out with a really cool friend I love it I think that's where the bond comes maybe it's different for everyone but I remember like for me it wasn't like an on and off switch like oh oh you have a Chanel um father Instinct immediately kicks in you know it takes time to grow it what's your advice from new parents I'm you wishen you before do not listen to anyone or take any advice from anyone that hasn't had a child within the last 2 years cuz they don't remember anything honestly I cannot believe this ask anyone anything about having a kid that is older than a couple years they will not remember a single goddamn thing it's like if they went in went through this traumatic event and their brain has just completely blocked out all the information that they receiv received from it I swear to God if they if I didn't see the people's kids in front of me I wouldn't even believe they had a child to begin with cuz I'm asking them question very basic questions like okay so what when did you start doing this or okay so when did you oh so how did you tackle these things they're like I don't know like what the what the [ __ ] you're the least helpful person so ask someone that I had a child recently par after to bring in a baby into looks as beautiful as ever I admire her that's right she's got that Mom glow more gorgeous than ever I absolutely agree how has your perspective in life changed since becoming a dad how do you balance responsibilities and split task mindset you know before having a kid I always mem hating kids it is kind of funny like now I'm all of a sudden noticing other kids and I look at them and I'm like they're so cute and like you emphasize with other parents like if I hear a baby crying it's not annoying to me I feel bad for the parents having to deal with it or whatever and you try and help if you can so it does change your perspective so much how were you parented as a kid and what methods do you want to continue and abandoned for bearing okay so a meme online is this like Millennial soft parenting everyone makes fun of it because it's like it's just Bullit like you need to just tell a child off sometimes but the millennial ways like sitting down talking to them how are you feeling you know yeah I think that's probably a balance but I do remember I think I think I was soft parenting cuz I remember one time I bit at kindergarten I think I must have been 3 or 4 years old this one of my earliest memories I bit my friend in the ear cuz he was super annoying it was actually his fault completely obviously and uh my dad came to kindergarten he wouldn't do that normally obviously I guess the teachers called my dad I knew I was in trouble trouble and I knew what I did you know it would be the kind of thing where like parents maybe get super angry and they take their kid home or something like that and I remember my dad just sat down next to me and just talked to me about it and uh that was it and I think I really appreciated that Approach at least now I do I think at then as well like I knew what I did was bad I didn't need to be yelled at you know what I mean uh but it he still sat down and talked to me and explain what it was wrong and I think yeah that's probably what I want to do as a bad I really appreciate my parents for doing that for being understanding and patient obviously there are times to be understanding and patient there are there are times to just be like knock that sh off you're going to hurt somebody uh or yourself I think again what I said earlier like it's easy to have principles and ideas about parenting if you haven't faced the struggles yet and I'm not really there yet with be so you know do you ever think for a second you would be a dad before having a kid or thought of having one okay I wrote this in my newsletter as well how when Maya was sick it kind of felt like taking care of a baby and for some reason that sort of clicked in my head like like we're kind of ready we're ready to have a child we're already taking care of one in a sense like it was such a obviously it's way different and I know that now but it just felt like we had this huge responsibility and I think that was like a nice Silver Lining of Maya being really sick for the last year that we had her so but I like you just don't know I think you absolutely have to be ready for having a child and you going to 100% want to have a child and uh also like I'm talking a lot lot positively about being a parent but honestly I respect any opinion of wanting to have a child is totally fine obviously you can live a long happy prosperous life either way you know uh but I do feel like now that I do have a child it changed my perspectives completely on life I feel so excited to be sharing it's like experiencing life again with a brand new set of eyes like I look forward to everything I I love to do again to do with be and share with be and face all these new challenges with be like yeah I want people to experience it I want more of my friends to have kids I hope they are watching this video and realize it's worth having children yes it's hard as but I don't know like just doing YouTube for the rest of my life what I like I have purpose now more purpose bigger purpose what's the most difficult uh thing yeah the language barrier here you need a pediatrician right and to find one that speaks English near us has been kind of difficult emergencies happen I think it's always kind of scary like that I don't speak Japanese fluently yet to the point where it's like when it's really important I I want to be able to be there for be if he needs it and a lot of times people don't speak English here in Japan so it's it's really difficult and scary and then it's a good motivator for me to actually like learn the language better and I think also like okay I learned these recently in Japan in Japan they have a ton of international schools a ton of them they're everywhere but it's not like International kids are going there it's for Japanese kids to learn English International School just means super expensive English lessons for kids we don't need to pay a ton of money for be to learn English he's not going to do that anyway so what was be's first word be's first word was mama and then he said dad now he says Papa his first word was baba baba say blowing BB item it's really cute we have that on video I can show that he hasn't really said it yet he's really in the face where now he's starting to really pick up words he's also said Lampa one time which means lamp in Swedish increases vocabulary slowly but surely yeah it's amazing to see him speak it's funny cuz he understands us you can ask him questions and he can say like you know he'll tell you if he wants to do something or not it's really really cute even though he can't really speak you can still communicate with him which is again like a thing he couldn't do before and now he can it's like what that's incredible ah have simped for my child this entire video thank you for watching I hope maybe that was helpful for people um considering ever becoming a parent you know there a lot of things to consider and um maybe you find helpful if anything thank you guys for always being so sweet and wonderful uh all the comments about B has been uh in the Vlogs especially like it's been so nice and it makes me actually want to share him online like a lot of people are very opinionated about having kids online or not and I think I share those opinions but he's so young right now that it doesn't matter like he doesn't understand any of it I don't have a personal issue having kid photos of me online like that doesn't matter to me so but I you know there will definitely be a time where we will not show be online and that will probably be the end of the Vlogs uh so I just wanted to be upfront about that now but for now yeah we are we really really appreciate all the love so thank you broest