We are in BIG trouble..

Well guys, another episode of AllCraft and this week I am extremely surprised because somehow a few years ago Rich managed to convince Mia Malova to start talking to him and here we are uh three years later. Is that right? Welcome Mia to the show. Five. Four. He always adds a year. But we're we're on our fourth year. Like halfway through our fourth year. Yeah, it's five. Four years. We've we've lived together for four and a half years. Oh my god. Wait. Wait. Hey, you can't you can't you can't do that to start off the Also, dude. Yeah. Can I tell you something embarrassing? What? Bro, she's been practicing that stupid gun thing for like days. For what? She thinks it looks cool. Oh, no. No. I did this and I was practicing it. I didn't do it just then, but I thought it was funny to do to him where like Yeah. So, I walked into the room. She didn't know that I was there and she's just by herself going Yeah. Well, you got to look at the mirror. Doing in the mirror, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, I was just trying to feel it, dude. In absolutely insane. Almost as insane as on the way here. She literally looks at me, notices that I don't have anything packed. Looks at what I'm wearing. And she goes, "Is that what you're wearing on the podcast?" Well, yeah. It's not I mean, look what I'm wearing. I mean, this is [ __ ] too. She then goes, she goes, I go, "What?" And she goes, "You're a reflection of me." I go, "Bitch, it's my podcast." I mean, to be fair, it does look like she got you off the side of the road. It does. It does. It's so bad. Like, honestly, it's worse than mine. Okay. And that's really HARD TO DO. SHE JUST DOESN'T TRY. And I haven't been able to get I look like a gay hobo. I know. You look like Wait, wait, wait, wait. Castway Wilson with the Wilson. OH, NO. IS IT THAT BAD NOW? Oh my god. I told you before we got started we'd be better off having Lucari as a guest than hers. She's just going to roast us for hours. That's fine. What's the worst that Lucari is going to make us do? Watch the Teletubbies. You do kind of look like though. You look like you're you're like jerking off Republicans for like $5 on like outside of like the Republican National Committee or something like that. All right, guys. Yeah. What's up, big boy? Yeah. No, I Well, I got this shirt. So, I ordered this shirt because like obviously people aren't celebrating Pride Month as much anymore, right? And so, I'm like, "Okay, well, now that no companies are celebrating it now, it's funny if I celebrate it now." And so, like, also, 343 Studios shut down. Are they not celebrating? Well, they're still celebrating, right? Halo is still Galo, but like other than that, no. So, nobody else is celebrating it. They don't change their profiles. So, I'm like, "Okay, all these people complain about me wearing the same shirt every day. So if I wear this same shirt every single day for June and they complain about it, they don't want me to celebrate Pride. That is true. That's homophobic. And so I basically now I can wear the same shirt all all month long and it's totally fine. Are you going to do it for Junth too? Uh well I I might wear a Well, actually maybe Yeah, maybe I could wear something different. Yeah. And uh sure, why not? You know, like Yeah. People think uh think Asthma's gay now. Yeah, they do. Do they actually? Uh yeah. Oh well, they they think that. So, because half of my stream is complaining about minorities and the other half is complaining about women. Okay. And there's like 1% that's playing video games, too. And so, I said that on average, men were more attractive than women. Oh, he told me, right? And everybody's talking about this. Everybody's complaining about this. And so, there's a bunch of these girls posting photos of themselves looking for approval to try to prove me wrong, but they keep end up proving me right. And so, I'm feeling very good about this. I Okay. Well, on average, right? On average, no makeup, no plastic surgery, nothing else. I mean, like, you think about it. I mean, on average, yes. It depends on what you find attractive. Well, okay. Oh my god. HE'S GAY. WELL, I'M JUST UNDERSTANDING WHY. EXPLAIN. There is an object there. Okay. So, if you look at a peacock, like a male and a female peacock, the male peacocks totally mo the females. It's not even remotely close. Oh yeah, you look at any other animal except for like three spiders. Okay, there's like three spiders that Okay, the male ones are really pathetic. But other than that, like a black widows, that's a good looking [ __ ] Exactly. Right. There you go. It's like a goth chick or something. But like other than that Yes. Which deers have the really cool antlers? The male deers. Which uh you know which moosees are the biggest? I think it's the male moosees. And so you have all these examples of all these animals that look way cooler. the male counterparts look way cooler and I feel like gay end of well the reason why the reason why is because women like if you can have a kid right it's totally like you have an intrinsic value so like if you're a guy you have to flex you have to find a reason why am I the perkiest peacock out there why am I the biggest rooster out there the best one and for whatever reason tight stray yes exactly and so men have to adapt other types of evolutionary beneficial things. And you see this with all kinds of animals. So I'm just simply saying it like if you can we go back to that frame. You see that chicken in the background right there right behind you? That's a you know what that chicken is? That's a male chicken. That's a male chicken. You know why? Because you can see it looks really cool. Well, that's the reason a female one. I think it I think it looks like a scrotum. I don't like it. But well, I mean, she does know if you if you were a female if you were a female chicken, it would be I mean like he would be he would be hot. So hot, right? And so like it's not really the inner species thing, but like you can see that there's a vision here, right? And so I I feel completely justified about this. I do. Okay. Totally. But what if what if human males done a [ __ ] themselves? Okay. Well, like let let me think. So like you have like the whole looks maxing thing. There's definitely that. They go to the gym all the time. They're lying extensive suits. They're having suits. Like basically, we don't have makeup, but we have facial hair, which is the closest thing that we can get. And like, you use that to hide like a bad jawline or something else or try to like make yourself look better. Uh guys also try to get hair transplants. I've heard that people do that, but without plastic surgery. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. You got It's got to be natural, right? Got to be natural. It's not just behavior. put on heels and dresses and you know they curled their hair because I believe your argument is basically saying before any before anything goes on anything happens body type one verse two yes and and like you see how many girls do you have a skincare routine oh yeah I don't and I don't have any freckle I don't have any freckles any blemishes nothing is on my face and I never wash my face I shave my face with a razor with no [ __ ] uh even shaving cream most of the time. I I clean myself with a knife and it's no problem. And I don't know why, but for some reason men don't have that problem. And I think that it's evolutionary. I do. He does have very nice skin, too. He does. And does he have a skin? Does he He really want to get him into it. I haven't showered since the POE 2 League came out. I don't need to. It was like a week ago. Yeah. I haven't showered. I Okay. I went to get sushi with a friend. And I hopped in the shower real quick and I remember I got out of the shower and I was like, "How do I still smell?" And then I just put on a bunch of deodorant and then I was like, "Oh, I'm seeing Zach. It's not a big deal." Yeah. I won't know. Yeah. No. So my skin's fine. Oh, your skin's great. Yeah. My skin does take a lot of work. Look. And I But but I don't I think that's cuz women on average are putting on a lot of makeup, so our skin is worse. And then we also overdo a lot of the skin care and stuff like that. We damage our hair by bleaching it, curling it. So Well, you guys, that's a lot of work, isn't it? I mean like jeez. It's also it's like it's like we're peacocking. Yeah. I mean it's it's a milk verse wine thing too, right? Like we're going to keep getting better looking. I don't think so. I'm going to be real. Like look, you haven't gotten better looking. So yes, because because Okay, let me explain why I've gotten worse looking. Uh-huh. There's it's it's a two-prong thing. Cuz you've gained weight. I know. Well Well, yes, but he hasn't worked out fat cells. He doesn't shower. See guys, it's not just me. No, you two are best friends. Hear me out. There's two reasons I've gotten worse. One, I'm not incentivized to get better looking because the worst looking I get, the better society perceives me when I'm next to her. That's true. They go, damn, he's funny. He's got to be really funny or really rich. Exactly. Exactly. So, society sees me and goes, "Damn, who the [ __ ] is this fat genius?" You know, you're not fat. Bro, don't [ __ ] lie on camera now. You literally call me fat every single day I wake up. You tell me to get You literally yesterday I was like, "Hey honey, you want to have sex one last time in California?" You go, "You really need to get a haircut, Rich Campbell." You know, maybe maybe we could have sex if you apologize for walking in front of me so far. That was really Do you see how you were wrong? Did that happen? G on the way here when we're at the airport traveling together. We're early going to the gate. He's walking 15 feet ahead of me. Look behind going. Why don't you catch up? Exactly. Because we're early. We're early. What? What do you mean you're man just walks ahead for no reason? And then expects to have sex. And then I said, "Sorry." He like gets to the hotel. He's like, "We're going to have sex later." I'm like, "Well, you better apologize." Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. No. But but she like remember she's like, "At 7:32 in the morning, you walked 15 clicks ahead of me. This is unacceptable behavior." and I must get an apology. And I'm like, what the f? Like she just like and she waits. She just waits and then she springs it on me. Just like holds it like holds it in for like 4 hours and then gets Sometimes it's 4 years. She'll It's a currency. It actually is. It's like a buildup like once like there's enough annoying things that happen. She literally she she said it's a currency. Dude, that is prostitution with low work ethic. Are you [ __ ] kidding me? It's a currency. So you're using it for like like this is crazy to get what I want. Yeah. I didn't even say the second reason why I'm I'm fat. Second reason is you. What did I do? Cuz you will decide that you're going on a diet. And then I do a behavior that I internally refer to as picking up the slack. So you have to eat more food for the food that she's not eating. Well, she had it in the house. I'm not going to let it go bad. My little my my little bubby when she was on a train to Ashawitz would have done anything for that food. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. So it's really it would be insulting not to not to eat all the food. It would it would be an insult to my Jewish heritage if I didn't, you know, and you'd also be wasting money. So, uh, you guys met at the OTK party we did like four years ago, right? It was on Miz's stream. It was on stream. I I I was going through my old videos. Look at this. Oh, I thought he was the cutest thing ever. That is the the day that they met. I wanted I wanted to see you that day. That, by the way, is uh Rich playing two or three different gotcha machines at the arcade so he can get Emmy a backpack. I don't think she ever got the backpack, by the way. But for some reason, he was playing all of them and wasting all. He didn't get the backpack. I have we have we ever told this story on I I think Miz had eventually said some of it. He did tell the story. You can Yeah, go ahead. That was one of the [ __ ] craziest nights ever. Yeah. Do you remember the I was talking to Tips about this not that long ago. So Tips and I had a miscommunication. Emmy So the night that Emmy joined OTK. Um she wanted to do go-karts. I remember. And and then we went to the other cuz we there were two of them. There were two locations. I didn't clearly say to Tips and Tips didn't clearly say to me which one we were doing it at. Mhm. We locked down an entire location, got it for the entire night. Nobody else was allowed inside, and we had security, whole nine yards, but it was the one without go-karts. So, then we had to decide, are we going to do the audible and go to the one with go-karts? Jacob went there, set up the whole thing cuz then we wanted to do go-karts. Emmy wants go-karts. We're doing [ __ ] go-karts. We get there, everybody's in there. Like, general public's still in there and everything's fine for a little bit. And then there's that creepy guy who was following us around like, man, what's going on? And then we hear, what was what type of card did Miz have? Some some $200,000 piece of [ __ ] I forget what it was called, though. It's like it was it was a super. But we hear cuz he used to say it all the time cuz Nick had the R8. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. And then Miz had like the I don't know. He would just always be like, "Yeah, it goes way too fast for Texas." Uh yeah, you that laugh like 10 times a day. I talk about Miz all the time. Oh jeez. I I just like I have so many good memories with everybody in OTK. I talk about everybody in OTK. It's crazy how like so so basically what happened is this guy hit Miz's car and like Yeah. You remember all this, right? Yeah. This dude straight up drives into his car, walks into the [ __ ] uh like whatever the arcade was with a [ __ ] loaded gun and like we were just like he was like following he was like basically following Emmy when we looked at the security footage like we thought. No, he Yeah, I did. It turns out he wasn't. He It turns out he was following the camera. We were all super defensive at at the time. But yeah, do you remember Smalls, our security guard? Yeah. and he got the gun away from him and like just like got the guy down on the ground like took the gun apart all that but I think that guy went to jail. Oh, really? That's good. I'm pretty sure but I I think I think Matt said that. Misc said that so I'm not sure. Yeah, I I don't remember anything of what happened and then we were all trauma bonded. Yeah. I just remember I remember we were walking out and everybody was hiding behind the cars. People were so afraid. They're like he's going to shoot us. I was like there's no way this drunk [ __ ] is going to be able to shoot us from this far away. Don't worry about I was with you. I was kind of like, why? Why is everyone so freaking out for no reason? Yeah, for streamers, bro. Okay, so so if I'm remembering correctly, Mia was hiding behind the car, too. I was not. So, I remember she was hiding behind a car. Someone would have h I was just trying to fit in. Oh, right. Trying to make everybody else feel safe. Oh, no. For sure. Definitely. I I feel like at the beginning, my perception of you as a human being was so different than what you actually are. Like I I I mean this from the bottom of my heart. What do you mean by that? Dude, I thought she was so [ __ ] cool. I thought she was crazy and like fun. And I was like, man, this is going to be like an adventure, you know? Like like she I mean, she was like naked in a hot tub pouring spitting tequila into people's mouths, giving everybody co Yeah. And I I just like, man, she's so much fun. yada yada yada. And then flash forward, I This is literally two days ago. I had been playing find out that she's not fun. Oh, dude. She She's uh she's very fun. Oh. Uh it's just a different kind of fun. I Okay, so I've been playing PoE. It's 7 7:00 in the morning, 6:00 in the morning. I'm getting ready for bed. So I usually what happens is I'll go get into bed while she's waking up, right? We we hang out for a little bit and I fall asleep and I literally get in bed after playing Pew and she goes, "Hercules expansion comes out today in Disney Dreamlight Valley." She is 2,000 hours played this year in Disney's Dreamlight Valley. What the [ __ ] is that? She plays more games than you, bro. Wait, I don't even know what it is. What's Disney's Dreamlight Valley? I did I did watch your YouTube video about Disney adults and I felt personally attacked. Disney You don't know him at all, though. He's a He's a Disney adult. I swear to God. It's his favorite place. It's the only place I could get him to go to. How many times have you been to Disneyland in the last 5 years? He loves Disney World. How many times have you been to a Disney theme park in the last 5 years? Go ahead, Rich. 10 to 15 times. Holy [ __ ] Are you kidding me? We live in California. We season passes. But we go year Season pass. We go yearly to Disney World. Oh my god. It's our favorite place. of the magical kingdom. Rich Campbell. Jesus. Rich literally. He loves to like dance with the kids at the bed. Wait, no. They were having a Disney They were having a Disneyland party and Little Rush came he came out of the castle with his little toy sword and he was like getting down with all the other 5-year-olds. Oh my god. All the other five That was I wasn't Okay, you got to you got to chill with that, bro. We had Lucari on the podcast one time. No, it it was they there was they had a DJ for New Year's and the only people who were dancing were 5-year-old kids and I I I literally I was like I was like, "Yay!" cuz nobody else wants to get recorded on their phone. Yeah. No, I'm I'm going to be real, man. I grew up as white trash. And my dad, who you know, rest in peace, never left the country his entire life. And we used to go to Disney. We had a time share. That's how [ __ ] poor and [ __ ] we were. We go to Disney and my dad, we'd go to Epcot and they have this around the world thing with all the different countries set up. It's like fake. I've been to like half the countries now in my life. My dad would go there and he goes, "See, son, this is why I never left the country because they do it better here right here in America." And he he literally was just we could just go to Disneyland and go to that country. And that was it. We we would just go to I love Disney World. And the funny thing is he makes fun of Disney adults and then he also makes fun of like NYU and like all the [ __ ] He just [ __ ] hates everything that I Well, I mean like really I mean the Disney adults things is [ __ ] ridiculous. And like also at least you guys can afford it. Okay. There's people going into debt for Disneyland. All right. I think that's a that's a little bit of a problem. All right. And I don't personally like meeting the characters. I'm not that bad. Really? They annoy the [ __ ] out of me when they come around to dinner. I don't like the restaurants really either that much. Like I just Dude, I like the rides and the environment. I It's fun. It's a vibe. It's magical. It's magical. I like Okay, so dude, you got to chill, man. You got to chill with like saying [ __ ] that's that gay. It's You're going to make us look bad. The magical. Yeah. Yeah. You can't be like, "Oh, it's magical." It is magical. Well, I mean, like, yeah. This one. Want to see a magic trick? Here's $500 and it's gone. It's so expensive. I know. We went on a vacation for her birthday. Um, and we went to Hawaii. And my god, that would be stream content for you. Why is that? I can't imagine you ever [ __ ] doing Why? It was nice. Have you ever gone somewhere and just done absolutely nothing? I usually do that at home, dude. Like, you would love it. We stayed at a fivestar resort. Like, we got drunk every day. They We got a little spot at the cabanas by the beach. We got drunk every day. Like, ate food all day. So, didn't do anything. I had a great time. Go sit in the water for 5 minutes, go back, lay down. I had a great time. I got so bored that I downloaded Ethereum Restart on my phone and spit It It had just come out. It was like a gotacha game. PvP gota game. I was like number five on the ladder. There was a guy named Brett who was number one who was just kept beating my ass in RTA and I was just sitting there in Hawaii. We spent all this money and I'm just on my phone playing a [ __ ] playing gotacha. I think I spent just as much on that as I did on the trip. Pretty sure I was watching Love Island in the cabana. Why do girls like Love Island? Love Island. Why though? The drama. It for me it's kind of like cuz cuz I don't have that drama in real life. So I like I like seeing other people have It's like vicarious. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. And then it's also it's kind of like a human experiment. Like you put a bunch of people that you know are going to do crazy [ __ ] and crash out in a little a little isolated villa together and then you just kind of watch them squirm. I feel like the guy version of that is like whenever they put two insects in like a cage and they kill each other. It's kind of this like that's like when right when it's like but like for girls but he Yeah. They're like complaining. He watches Love Island with me sometimes too. Honey, I'm trying to get my dicks up. No, the the thing is I look I did the same thing I did. I did the same thing and I had no problem. I remembered all the character names. You watched it. Cool. It's entertaining. Of course. Yeah. Well, we're not really paying it. I'm not really give a [ __ ] If you're not paying attention, Rich, he's like, "Oh, Ella, she's my favorite." Why did he do Ella like that? Well, yeah. He's going to have to act like he's interested in the show. As now, he was interested. He's interested. I'm Well, I mean, if you if you're sitting there watching it regularly, you're going to have an investment into this. I don't think that it like I mean, I had opinions on who my favorite people on the show were. I'M LITERALLY I DID I had opinions. I'm like sitting there building Warhammer while we're watching. I'm like, "Oh, yeah. I like the hot one." So deep, bro. My analytical. We want to give a big shout out to our sponsor, Poly Market, and we really do need to thank them because this was supposed to be a month-long sponsorship. We've been working on it for four. Oh, well, you know, like things can take a little bit longer because of uh well, me, right? It's completely my fault. And also, yeah, I I I get half of my news from Poly Market. This is maybe sounds kind of bad, but like I'll see like they'll tweet something out and usually it actually happened, right? And I'll see this and I'll be like, "Oh my god, okay, well, there it is." And I talk about it all the time. So yeah, Poly Market's been supporting us right from the beginning, even though our schedule was awful and we totally have been late on like four things. So huge shout out. Thank you very much, Poly Market. And uh yeah, I mean, it's been it's been great. I'm surprised. They should probably throw up on there whether or not we're going to be late to our episode the next one. But yeah, guys, you can hop on right now and you can use code allcraft. And we just thank Poly Market so much. We've had an absolute blast working with them. Hope to do a lot more with them in the future. Yeah. Thank you very much, Poly Market. No, it's wild though when you really start to see the differences between what girls like and what guys like, you do realize that they probably shouldn't have the right to vote. I agree. Yeah, it's a huge problem. And uh yeah, I've been like, well, this is again like I see all the time like there's like once a day now there's like some big post of me saying something like this and it no it's going like people are losing their [ __ ] mind over it and I'll see this and I'll just read it like the people are just getting so mad. Don't you want to like focus on like the things that you're really good at like being a mother or a prostitute? Well, I show I SHOWED HER THAT TWEET. I I literally showed her that and she was like, "It's a good one, right?" Certified banger. Certified banger. Oh my god. People are going to be talking about that for like a year. Oh my god. No, I I feel I feel so satisfied. I am so like, "Oh my god, it really must be nice to like just say whatever you want to I say, well, I don't I I have to filter some things out, but like, you know, I've always I have thought about making a second Twitter account to be even worse. Like making a completely anonymous Twitter account that every single intrusive thought is a tweet. Every single one. There was somebody that we used to make content with. Who had an account, a a burner Twitter account called Schindler's Second List. And it would tweet or sorry they would tweet the most insane [ __ ] from him ever. And I always like damn I need a burner like that. I know. I I think I'm going to make another one. I'm going to make another Twitter account where I'm just going to be as toxic as possible. You should just let it out. Well, just say it. Yeah. And like these would be the tweets that like I can't say myself because the world isn't ready for it yet. M I don't know how much further you'd really go besid because like I I feel he could go further. But here's the thing. At a certain point you end up there's not that much further to go without saying like a slur. And slurs are boring. What he's doing right now is creative. It's actually I'm sure there's opinions that he's not You don't want to be Chud the Builder, bro. Lazy one line. He's the same as like Woody from Chipel. Chip it out. Chipping out. We're not saying it to anyone. Yeah. I mean I mean I've said it like 50 times. You say [ __ ] all the time. Yeah. Is that Well, in private Rich Campbell. Uhoh. She loves Mitch. I do. I have Warick Davis. I want to name my cat after him. I love Warick. She just loves me. So, do you go to the seven dwarves thing in Disneyland, too? I don't love him that much. That much. That was scary. Wait, you know, you notice how like like I literally like I tried to bait her out. I was like, "Yeah, something about the M." And then she's like, "Oh, yeah, I love midgets." Didn't defend her right to vote at all. Yeah, I don't vote anyway. That's smart. We we we on behalf of all the men. We really appreciate that. Thanks, bro. Women are going to hate it. Listen, no, no, no. I believe women should vote women. Oh, no. I just personally don't care myself. I don't care about politics. So, like I I'm not interested in it. I don't know anything about it. Why would I vote? I mean, I I the the thing is to me, usually any day that I have the day off, I don't even open up Twitter. I don't even look at social media. All I do is I wake up and I walk to the gas station and I play video games all day. That's it. That's my entire life. I play Disney's Dreamlight Valley and I cuddle my dog. So, what is is that like a Is that like Genchin Impact? I think that it's more like Stardew Valley, but it's a Disney character. She makes like a world. I I decorate and I hang out with the villagers, which are Disney characters, bro. She wa She'll be watching YouTube craft items and I gather sticks and stuff. Jesus, dude. She'll It's like Animal Crossing. Oh, yeah, dude. She'll be watching videos of like these content creators. And I'm not saying this in a mean way. They're like very autistic. They are, and I love them, but then I'll like But I think so, too. Yeah. I'll look at the view count and it'll be like 136 views and I'm like you are like you're dating. And the whole Disney Dreamlight Valley Reddit thinks those are big content creators. It's quite funny. And they have like a few thousand subscribers, I'm sure. Right. Yeah. And I love I watch them every day. She subscribes to on Patreon. I do. I'm supporting them. Oh my community, right? She paid like like on Patreon. Yeah. She paid people to make stuff in the Sims for her because she has a giant Sims world where she kills all the women and [ __ ] No. No. I have I have a medieval Sims save file. And I have like 5,000 mods on it and I' I've put I've put probably years of my life into this medieval save file. But I have a brothel, which he thinks this I get really [ __ ] up in there. She has a girl. So, do they kill them? Dude, she has she has this one girl. This is the most [ __ ] up thing I've ever [ __ ] seen. It's pretty. She She's literally I hear her just I'm like, "Why the [ __ ] you laugh?" And she goes, "I made this one so tight that she will never enjoy sex. I made one of the girls in my brothel so tight that she was in pain and would cry when she would ever she would have sex." So like, did they have to pay more or less for that? It's the same. Oh, wow. She's just miserable while [ __ ] So like how do you know? Like so do do they have like emotes where like they're crying emoji or something? Like how does it work? Well, she physically gets tears from the mod. So she's crying and like she's crying and then also what is it called? But it they have like little mood lits and it'll tell me. So she'd be like, "Ouch like she's too tight. That was like that really hurt kind of thing." Yeah, it should. Yeah. And then like it'll Honey can't say that. Okay. Yes, ma'am. Here's your look. Look, my my sweet sweet angel. Uhhuh. When I look I wasn't talking to you. I was just I was just continuing. I was continuing. Don't worry. I didn't expect you were I would hope that [ __ ] shirt, bro. Like, yes, dude. Like, what? What do you say? I like this shirt. It's a nice shirt. I like it on you, man. I do like it on you. Pop the color. Uhhuh. Look like you're gonna spark a joint with Dan Clancy right now and [ __ ] party with all the affiliates. I'm not old enough for that yet. you're actually I'm only 15 years older than him. But yeah, no, I I like I look at that Sims file and I'm just like, damn. Like girl autism is so different than guy autism. And she like specifically will like try to do the girl versions of things that I'm doing and I'm like you're being a serial killer right now. I So I got into Warhammer, right? So I'm building models. I'm painting. I'm like listening to Lauren and [ __ ] She She's like looking at it and I can tell that she's like, "Oh, she's like trying to hobby with me." So I bought her a bunch of Warhammer. She never touched it. All of a sudden she's got all these [ __ ] Barbie dolls and she's [ __ ] drawing on their faces and [ __ ] and she's like, "Look, it's girl Warhammer. I opened up the freezer the other day. She's got a Barbie doll in there with plastic around its head. She's freezing its hair." I go, "What the [ __ ] are you doing?" And she goes, "Giving it a haircut." What the She's not What the [ __ ] What are you doing? Well, I was just fixing his hair. Like, it doesn't What's wrong with this? It was It stands out cuz it's Barbie hair. And I cut it. I cut it too much. So, I needed to flatten it. And so, I got it wet and then I wrapped a bunch of aluminum foil over it or plastic wrap around his face and I froze him. That's the level of insane that most women like I obviously I don't think that like I I'm joking around. I think women should have the right to vote. I uh you know, it's it's gay people that should lose their rights. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. We we don't want another uh we don't want another uh last week's episode. Oh, yeah. Holy [ __ ] He got roasted. I got Yeah. To be fair, I do talk a lot. Like I but yeah, it's gonna sound like I talk a lot when we had to delete everything that the guest said from the podcast. No, it was it was a really we were getting into it. We we record for what 3 to four hours every single episode. Uh I mean usually like two, I'd say. We we usually go like a little bit longer. Like we do like a bit extra. We cut from like every episode, right? I guess not four hours. We were doing four hours at the beginning. You're right. But we do a little bit extra. Last week we had to cut out an hour of content. The last note on the I I swear in my life I don't think you look at the editor notes, do you? I don't I honestly I don't even look at how I don't know how well the episode did. I don't know what the comments were. The only time like I don't even read my comments. I don't know how well my YouTube's doing. I never even look at anything. I I've never looked at dashboard. I have no idea how much how much money it's making. I have no idea. I literally We're losing money. You know, you can't want them all, right? Like, I just don't worry about it. Like, the only thing I worry about is playing video games and doing my show. That's it. I found it really weird when I came back because you you got to keep in mind overall for me, I'm kind of like stepping out of a time machine. Like legit, our life was so incredible. I mean, we really did spend So, what's it like now that Rich ruined all of it to go back to streaming? I like him not being up my ass 24/7. Literally. Wow. Not not literally. God, we've never even done anal. Yes, we have. We tried. One time like 3 years ago. No, we after after the Pornhub awards you told me to to and then I I I like we did. I don't know why we didn't. Oh, his penis is too big for me. Why you laugh? How about that? How about that? That's crazy. Well, I mean, wow, look at me. I have to have at LEAST ONE GOOD THING. HAVE SOME REDEEMING QUALITY, RIGHT? YEAH, of course. Everybody, they I just put all my stat points in one useless place, you know. Uh, but Oh, man. Thank Thank you, man. I thought you were going to roast me this whole podcast. Uh, what was I say? Oh, so I come back and the whole internet's changed. I'm actually flushed right now. That's how you know I still love her. Uh, that meant a lot to me. Uh, so I'm not all So, so you know, we spent we we had a lot of fun just three years of, you know, obviously people are always going to joke about, you know, her doing porn and like all that [ __ ] But real real ones are real ones, you know what I mean? We had we had a great time hanging out. Three years went by and now half the girls do it anyway on the website for for like 30 bucks. You know what I mean? Uh, that's Yeah, probably less than that. Yeah. Yeah. Realistically, right? Um, like, but I come back to the internet and I see people like even saying [ __ ] about you and like clips about you and stuff and look, do I think that every single thing that you say is perfect? No. No. Nobody. Nobody is. But I I like look at the delusional takes about you that are happen like there is literally a discourse going on about whether or not you're gay based off of something that you said. And I don't know if you remember this. Remember when uh Instagram when I was like, "Yo, you need to like start doing Instagram." This is like six, seven Oh, Jesus. Like years ago, and I was logged into your Instagram. Let me tell you one thing. Being the guy who was on Asmin's Instagram, I know for a fact that man is not gay. Well, look, I mean, like, yeah, that's what I do. I mean, what the [ __ ] I the feed was I was just like, what the [ __ ] is going on? What do you What do other people use Instagram for? Like what? Dogs? Like I don't give a [ __ ] about that. Well, yeah. No, I agree. Yeah. Yeah. But what's your what's your type? I mean, it depends, right? I am I Okay. Oh, like I am not a discriminator, right? I'm not I think that like really, you know, sometimes you like coffee ice cream, sometimes you like vanilla, cookies and cream, chocolate, etc. So, I don't like to go and just say one type of person. I think that's the wrong way to do things, right? It is. And it depends. You know what really counts, guys? It's the personality that is it's it's it's the personality. It is. It's so That's what matters the most. It's what's inside, right? You're my best friend. Yeah, it is. You're my best friend. You You actually are my best friend. Nick Nick Fuentes was like I saw a clip of Nick Fentes being like, "Yo, if you say that your wife is your best friend, you are gay." And I was just like, I've said it before and it always feels gay. But I I mean, you are one of my best friends in the entire world. And the funny thing is it doesn't look it. But you guys are kind of similar. Very similar. Yeah. Actually, I think we a little we are cuz I kind of I'm very content to do nothing. Yeah. So am I. Yeah. Like I'm I'm I don't have anything to prove. I like to wake up, stay home, stay to myself, play my video games. it. But we're very different in other ways, right? I really like it's because But that's that's like cleaning and grooming. Yeah. That's like girl, right? I feel like that's the female versus the male. Like I mean, I'm going to get in trouble for saying this. I think you're both spurs. We talked about that in therapy. I'm not allowed to call him. He keeps calling me autistic and it's really messed up. I'm not autistic. You're not? Well, I mean, being a spur is different. In what way? So spur is the etmology of the word comes from asberers, right? I don't have asberers. Okay. But these are two separate things, right? No, it's a spectrum. Asperers is a lower form of autism. Well, yeah. It's like kind of autism light where it's like, okay, you're just kind of a, you know, like it's kind of you're kind of weird in social situation. No, being weird does not make you autistic. It just makes you quirky. Uh, it depends on the kind of weird it is, right? I mean, I feel like some cases, yes, some cases, honey. And I I I don't mean this as an insult. I think that any person who can make it through, correct me if I'm wrong because I'm sure that people at home want to hear about this. I think anybody who could be in the porn industry Mhm. and have it like not affect them at all mentally has something special uh going on. Well, that's I think you have like a that's like a higher form of existence, right? I would say that's a higher like for example, there are a lot of people like anytime that you talk to streamers offream, the only thing that they want to talk about is about how everybody hates them and everybody's so mean to them and about how their career is failing and how they hate themselves. Live based streamers and and they're like the most autistic ones. Yeah. It's always the ones that literally like and and you have to have like an ego. I think you have it's an ego and then it's also like a victim mentality where I kind of look at it and I'm like I live the best life ever. Like I sleep in every day. I have money. Like I do what I want to do. I don't do anything I don't want to do. Like I've been I feel very blessed. Yeah. I get jealous every now and then. I'm like if I if I had the option to do that I would. But like literally it's like damn what'd you do for work today? It's like, well, I took a selfie and then I tweeted it and I said, "What if I bounced up and down on it like crazy style and then got like 30,000 likes and it's like I also just don't find like my body offensive." Like the thing is I don't find porn offensive in any sort of way. It's it's adult content. Like obviously doing stuff off camera and behaving a certain way is inappropriate, but no, like it's I think porn is bad for people. Yeah. Actually, I don't think it's good. I don't think I'm a saint or anything. Yeah, I know. But I think I think streaming is also bad for I agree. I agree. Yeah, I don't think you're you guys are saints side. Well, why'd you quit streaming? You were streaming for a while. I quit streaming in solidarity to Rich. She's going to come back. Yeah. So, you going to come back then? No. No. Now I've gotten content with my lazy lifestyle. I think I think eventually she'll turn it back on though. It's funny though cuz I go, "Oh, what what would you stream if you stream?" She's like, "The Sims for seven hours a day." No, I wouldn't I wouldn't do that. I was a good streamer. Okay. I had some of the most popular clips, the top ones. Yeah. Dude, it's literally It was like sitting there and it was like the two most popular clips on Twitch was today. That was one of the top clips. Oh, yeah. The only thing that was beating us was her picking something up. The people want what the people want. It's supply and demand. Do you know how hard I worked on that stream? Jacob and I had to go to a Best Buy ass off on that. It was so good. Well, dude, before you got there, Jacob and I had to go to a Best Buy. We didn't have enough money to permanently buy new PCs. We went to a Best Buy, bought three Alienware computers, and returned them the next day. Wired up that whole gym. And then we did all that stuff with the green screen. And I remember that is the one I'll hold over your head. You kept telling me, you were like, "Oh, dude, why the [ __ ] we do?" Oh, dude. Oh, it's so stupid, Rich. What the [ __ ] I don't want to do anything bad idea. Well, because I'm usually like I don't want to do anything. Like the only thing that I really ever want to do is sit around and play video games and like okay so what is think about the easiest possible thing okay that's what I want to do if you look back though on the times when you did [ __ ] that was like yeah it took a little bit effort don't you look back on him fondly so that event was really good that was a great event I think it was one of the best I hate to say it but like I grade all of the events during that time period with different arguments that I had with my girlfriend at the time because I'd always be in the middle of an argument with her during the show. Oh god. At the beginning. Yeah. Yeah. I remember that. Like Yeah. It was always going on and it was always an there was always and I remember Oh, that was the time that you know like that she threw my shoes off of the off of the balcony or something. Right. Well, I was being I was being very bad. Okay. And so, yeah, it's totally my fault, of course. Okay. But no. Yeah. So I I do remember I mean I would say overall they were enjoyable, right? It was enjoyable. I liked it. I mean there were some things I was not a big fan of, right? But otherwise it was good. I think that there was obviously some bad memories. But when you look at every moment separately There are some really good ones like with with everybody. Like there there were some Oh, we had a lot of fun. We did like we we did so many like there are so many videos like the one I I was showing you guys like I have so many of those from back in the day that I just recorded behind the scenes and like just different random photos and [ __ ] like I did a video of you in my phone that I always look at. Which one is it? It's just you with a sword chasing a deer. Oh yeah. I didn't get him. Yeah. What are you doing? You're just I won't get Didn't get him. No, you were just always out and around. It it felt like you you got to also put the context on it where we had all been inside for so long. Because like we had been grinding on stream like we what we both start my 10y year anniversary on Twitch which I was streaming before that too on a different channel but my 10 year on my channel is uh July 6th. Uhhuh. So that is we started all craft before that. And you look at how much you were grinding, how much you were inside. I was streaming a lot. Yeah. At night too, which is like I think a lot of people don't understand how how lonely that can kind of be. There's there's a lot of enjoyment to it. But Right. But you are kind of And then all of a sudden we did OTK and now we're all in the same place. And look, I literally met my girlfriend doing OTK. Like all this stuff. So, it's like I I do think that there are a lot of moments where it's like, damn, that was that was awesome. There were like I I will admit that the um the the wrestling one was really cool. It was probably it was probably the coolest one that we did. I would say also the we play one was also really good. Like that was a crazy stream. Okay, both of those are my ideas. I'm feeling good right now. Okay, I'm trying to think besides that. I mean I those would be the first two that I would the the investors the shareholders meeting where we introduced Schlatt was really good. that was a good one. Um you know which one was like scary. What's that? And just like went off the rails, the Bruce one when they pulled out that lie detector. Oh. Was like do do you like do you like black people or something like that? Right. I was like just like oh [ __ ] [ __ ] dude. What do I do? What do I do? What do I I I remember watching that one live and I think they asked Rich like if you had ever said the N word. That's I guarantee you that's probably the first thing Bruce asked. Yeah. I think it was him. They asked me that. They think they asked me is that. I thought they asked me is that cuz I I probably at that point would have just said it. What else do you do? That that's like the issue with comedy. It's like at that moment that's like you'd be like no but I'm going to say it for my first time right now. You know what I mean? Um, yeah. I just so many good memories. So many so many good memories. Like it, dude. Being at NMP's house and just like hanging out there. Like, man, good [ __ ] times. I You know, the one thing that I want to do again, just open up Pokemon cards with the boys. Oh, [ __ ] That was so boring. I hated Pokemon card openings. LIKE, REALLY? YES. They're so stupid. Like, I just like I don't understand. Like, what? Who the [ __ ] buying these cards? Nobody's buying these cards. Who cares? It's cardboard. I know people buying the cards. Yeah. Our our friends are Dylan Dylan and his wife. They're opening Pokemon cards every single day. But they're they're they're not buying the single cards, right? No. No. Well, no. They're buying the pack and the opening. They are. They're buying some single cards. No one's collecting shinies right I mean, I just I mean, it's a collector's thing. But like, what do you mean collecting? You know what I think? You're collecting. You're collecting the cards. And I think it's like a It's nostalgia with Pokemon. I don't need this. I didn't I remember the way it was. You still have the [ __ ] card I gave you though. I do. The slowpoke. Yeah. Yeah. So, like at the end of the day, that's a that's a special. It's But I'm not going to be pulling for more slowpokes, right? I already have one cuz you gave it to me. I don't know. I don't understand And I feel like I Are you kidding? You are the biggest collector ever. Look, look of memories. You probably have ADHD like me, bro. Like if I go into your room. There is [ __ ] that's been there for like 15, 20, 30 years. And you pick it up and you go, I remember the day that this happened. You are collecting. It's the memory. Well, yes. I Well, it keeps you grounded. There are mmentotos that I have. There are like little things that I have that are like, "Oh, I got this at like this event or somebody gave this to me or I got this when I was like 10 or something, but like like oh yeah, I want to collect every single labu." Like, oh my god, what is wrong with you? The glitter dumplings. Like, what the [ __ ] is wrong with I've been collecting barb vave? That's [ __ ] I have I have all of the like historical and fantasy ones. What? They have those. Oh, yeah. Like for what? Like is there like a Barbie? I just got the Lord of the Rings couple. Is there like his is like Abraham Lincoln Barbie? Uh no, but there's an Elvis Barbie. She bought a LeBron James Barbie. I did cuz I liked his shoes. Is it like taller than the other? It is taller than the other Barbies. I know. I know. I can't wait to dress him nice. I've been buying him clothes off of Etsy. Oh my. How [ __ ] crazy is that? That is nuts. Like I just How crazy is that? I bought a dollhouse. No, you didn't. You told me. I told you. I lied. It's coming. How much was it? It was only like 250, but it was like a modern farmhouse style. I need to move my giant teddy bear to make room for it. My my little sister visited not that long ago. And she literally said something to me along the lines of like, "Yo, dude, uh Mia like is going to buy a giant dollhouse. I might want to talk to her." And I was LIKE I WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW WHAT? SHE said she liked the dollhouse. She was like, "Just buy it. Buy it. Just buy it now. You're going to buy it eventually. You want to know why my little sister's based?" She cuz she literally she convinced Even though I hear what you're saying right now, she convinced you to keep it in your room. Uh where else am I going to put it? Rich. Well, I just as long as it's not anywhere that I have to see. He literally We spent $10,000 on a custom bookshelf for all of his [ __ ] Warhammer. And he's bitching about my Barbie doll. Holy [ __ ] How much money have you spent on Warhammer? Yeah. How much money have you spent on Warhammer? Actually, no. Mia, how much do you think he spent? I think he spent at least 25 grand. It's not that bad. So, so here's the thing with Here's the Here's the thing. I haven't spent 25 grand on Barbies. It depends what what you're asking me as far as like how much I spend on Warhammer cuz the I traded in a lot of old Magikards for for like I still have like $9,000 of store credit for traded in Magikards. I did spend some money, but you know what I I do spend money on and I enjoy it every single time. We do road trips. Yeah. Like me and like four of my buddies uh will like drive out to like Palm Springs for the weekend. 200 bucks maybe for the tournament. We're drinking at the tournament and stuff like that. I I spent a lot of money on that and it's worth every it's worth every penny. Warhammer's like one of the best communities ever and the new edition comes out. I've thought about playing Warhammer. Rich is trying to get me to start playing Warhammer and I'm I'm I'm strongly considering it. You probably like it. Well, I used to play it. I used to like I was in like high school. I was playing it, right? And like then it's like you don't have the money to afford any of the figurines. So, you're just sitting there with like five guys and it's like, okay, dude. You could get them all like c you could get them all professionally painted. I saw the one that you got for him. It was amazing. Oh my god. Thank you. Yeah. So, I can't play with it. I'm too scared. Like actually too scared. But yeah, I I mean I think it's one of the best hobbies to get into because you stop what you're doing. You slow down. You're not sitting there playing a video game and just for a second you're just like focusing on something in the real world. It makes video games more fun. It's like a nice meditating process to hobby. And then the game itself is the best that it's ever been by a mile. Really, the game is so fun. It's so good. the new edition. Uh so basically every three years right now there's essentially a new edition with the new rules like WoW expansion more or less and then they patch every few months. They patch quick. Um so there's a there's different metas all the time but the new rules come out on the 20th of this month. So it's like the perfect time to start playing the 20th of the month. I could start playing at the end of the month playing Warhammer the world champion. The current world champion. is he coaches me in Warhammer. He has agreed if we want to do a video where you play for the first time, you will learn how to play from the current world champion. So, I probably lose. Most people will. Or you could play against me and he can coach you and you just kick the [ __ ] out of me. I like that. Yeah. I'll let you beef me. Well, I I don't know. Like I I'm considering it. I will maybe start playing Warhammer or doing something else, right? Cuz like the only literally the only thing I do is play video games. What video games are you playing? Play POV all the time. And then like I was playing uh [ __ ] Death Stranding, which was insanely good. Like I expected it to. So it's you're literally like you have to make sure that your like your walking doesn't go like it's harder to walk this character than it is to drive a car in Forza. It's [ __ ] insane. And it's like you have to just take your mind out of the concept of beating the game. You have to just simply experience the game extraneously. You just kind of It's like one, you know, like a stream of consciousness. You played the first one or the second one? The first one. Then I'm going to play the second one. What type of game is it? It's like a game where there's like a bunch of weird [ __ ] fantasy sci-fi [ __ ] that happens. And you have to take packages and deliver them to like different areas. And you have to do it because there's like some special power that you have that's compounded with another type of attribute that you have that makes you special. I guess is it survival? Is it RPG? It's a very It's a very narrative art narrative game. Okay. Narrative. Okay. I I haven't played it yet, but my understanding is that's very narrative driven. And that's what I do. I I just I play that. What else have I played? [ __ ] Um I'm trying to even remember like I I Oh, I played Resident Evil 9. The new Resident Evil. Oh, Resident Evil. Fantastic. Resident Evil's good. It's so [ __ ] scary. You didn't you go back and play four? I'm playing it now. I love scary games. I get terrified. So, you loves scary in general. Did you play the new Resident Evil game? I don't think so. Wait, which one? At the last Yeah, that was the last one I played, No, no, no, no. Resident Evil Requum's the new one. No, no. I played the one with the lady demo, whatever her name. True. The uh Yeah, that was the last one I played. Oh, with the chicken white. that the the thick mama. The thick mama. That was a crazy That was a crazy cosplay event. It was really Yeah. Yeah, man. That was uh I keep trying to get her to cosplay like all the new gotacha characters. I wanted to do a YouTube series, but we're both just so lazy where it was like basically she has to do a cosplay and she has to do it as cheap as possible and every time she spends a dollar I'm allowed to spend that much in the game. So this is just a strategy to rationalize spending. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. He also knows I don't budget very well. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. She's the It's yin and yang, dude. She's the anti-Jew. You know, you know what game I've been trying to get her to play though. Um because of you cuz you made me actually play it. Expedition 33. Oh yeah. Well, I plan to play that one day. It seems like a really best games ever made. Yeah. It's only one thing about it every day. Yeah. I literally went like I'll play it eventually. I'm still finishing Balders's Gate 3. I get distracted and then like I I'll stop playing something. I'll go to something else and then I'll go back to like my main games. Then I'll go back to it for a little bit. Did I tell you about what happened with her with Boulders J3? No. It's one of the biggest fights we've ever gotten. So I I He's He's awful to play games with. I don't know. I feel like I never have had issues playing with Red. I'm great to play games. Yeah, it's never been that big of a deal. Like issues and complaints the whole time. You suck at Well, I complain, too. I I enjoy a ro It's a role playing game. Do your impression of me playing games. Oh. Um, this is the dumbest [ __ ] [ __ ] that I've ever seen. Like, these developers need to kill themselves in a video game. Like, I'm done playing. I'm never playing this [ __ ] again. No, I need it this time. I'm not playing this [ __ ] again. Yeah. Okay. So, where's the problem? Yeah, I agree. He's right. WELL, WHEN WE'RE TRYING TO HAVE A NICE relaxing time playing the relaxing, it's not exactly fun. Yeah, that's right. We we were playing the split fiction and and I just kept be like I I'd be like, "Oh man, I didn't realize that this game was a a waiting simulator." No, he he would he would go on a rant. He'd be like, "This is the dumbest [ __ ] [ __ ] I'm never playing this game again. I'm having a horrible time." Then the next day he'd be like, "Oh, you want to play Split Fiction again?" He's like, "No, I'm having the best time with you. I'm having so much fun. It's one of my fondest memories." That's just what happens. Yeah. No, I like whenever you're in the middle of the game and something's not going right or somebody's [ __ ] up or something's going wrong. Yeah. Yeah, you're going to get mad. That's what it is. I still don't get it, though. Why would you Why would you yell about something you don't love? Huh? Why would you get angry about something you don't love? Like, if I care that much, I clearly care about it. Maybe. I don't know. I just think you need to chill, man. So, we were playing Balders Skate. Okay. And I was like, you know what's going to be so fun? I will do a co-op campaign with her. This is bro, we get in act one. We barely There's no way you got through act one. through act one. No, we didn't. Yes, we made it over. Yeah, we we literally got through act one. It was act right to the end. No, it was act two. The very beginning, the first vendor when we got in our huge fight. Okay. Well, we got in a fight before And I there's another fight. Yeah, we got in a fight. He just kept talking to Asterion and Asterion was my man. Oh, she got in a fight because the wrong character got the sex scene. She started screaming at me. And you want to know what? He already had his playthrough. He got to romance who he wanted to. This was my turn. It was our play. So, you were stealing her character. No, I wasn't. Yes, he was. Why? You had no business talking to Asterion. No business. It was First of all, she keeps saying it's my play. It was our play. No, it was my playthrough. You already had your playthrough. I literally started this playthrough and then I He joined after the tutorial. So, it was mine. I don't think they should be allowed to drive either, honestly. Like, the thing Yeah. I mean like because you're not going to take her side. No, not with that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, because the thing is is if we're both playing, it's our play through. If you were playing by yourself, it's your play. It's my playthrough that I invited you to. I still got to control it. Bro, you want to hear the other crazy thing? dude. We're So, we're playing the video game. Every single time that we get to combat, she just hands the controller to me and she'll like get up and leave the room. She's like, "You'll let you handle it." SHE MADE ME DO EVERYTHING. THE COMBAT the combat overwhelmed me a little bit at the beginning. I've gotten That's a lot of stuff. It is a lot of stuff. I've gotten used to it now. Like I have my own play through going on. I'm in act two. Like I do my own combat, but yes, it was very overwhelming at the beginning. It's a hard game. Yeah. I mean I have I never played Balders. It's not a hard game. Well, yeah. I never did. Like cuz I always had this idea. Okay. one day me, Rich, and McConnell and maybe Sand or somebody else are going to do a playthrough, right? And so I never played it. And this is like four years or three years ago. We should know. It's such an amazing Well, I I want to do I think what we do is we do Divinity. Do it on McConnell stream. Let Let the dude pay rent. Dude, he was he was playing WoW the other night. You knew that was bad. I was like And rent's not due. Yeah. Yeah. He was just playing WoW. Playing for fun. And I was like, "That's nuts." I'm like, "Bro, you okay, dude?" I messaged. He didn't message me back. I messaged him the the one day. So, you had played WoW. And I messaged him and I go and and then the war happened. And I go, "Man, you almost got him." And then he pulled right back. That [ __ ] was so annoying. I was so mad they started that [ __ ] war, man. Because I had it like I was going to play the game for like a week, man. And then like all this [ __ ] happens and I'm like, "Okay, well now it's ruined." You You want to do the crazy thing? I I think this is so funny. Check this out. This is just This shows how [ __ ] they are. So, what do you think of all the housing stuff that they added? Wow. It's pretty cool, right? What? It's not a trap. How [ __ ] Who are Blizzard? Okay. I know you're you're going to say it's for women, not men. I I think the housing thing is kind of cool. Okay. Okay. So, she thinks it's kind of cool. She She likes it. She likes it. How many hours have you played World of Warcraft in in the past uh since the expansion came out? Well, I just didn't like Endgame. It's not It's No, no, no. How many hours? Zero. But that's because that's cuz I I got Endgame and I realized I didn't like it. Everyone was really mean to me. Well, yeah, because you're probably doing [ __ ] wrong, dude. Exactly. Yes. But but I have to learn and I'm trying to learn and people are just [ __ ] picking on me every time I log in trying to do my dailies. So I I actually I I was crying. I was so sad cuz I think some of the most fun that I had in OTK that you actually weren't a part of. I don't know why. Uh probably because SF was playing Paladin in the group. Uh we were playing WoW together. Every Oh, I never played with anybody. You never play with them? I I hate playing with anybody. Like all I want to do, like the thing is like all I want to do is get all the loot. So that's all I care about. I've played in three guilds with NMP. Like before OTK like uh in OTK we played classic together. Like NMP is one of my favorite people to play WoW with very good at the game. And he's always surrounded by people who are very good at the game. So it was NMP to what what was that one expansion? Is it Shadow Shadowlands? I it was such a beautiful expansion. I played the whole storyline in first person. You well uh that's you know what I told See this is what I've been trying to say. This is this is you know what this I I've never been more vindicated in my [ __ ] life. I knew it. I knew it. I knew that's what was happening. I knew that was the target audience. I knew it wasn't me anymore. And that's fine. You know what? That's okay if they want if they want to do that. It's great. It's my favorite. It's my favorite expansion. That's Wow. Looking around hard and real butterflies. I was really proud of them for that one. I just I mean the vampire one was kind of nice, right? But like ventier. Yeah. Ventier. Yeah. Riven dress. Revan. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, look, Shadowlands was really good until you had to play the game. It was a great idea. It was It was a really good beta. It's like then you was like, "Wait, I got to play this every single week." There's a lot of stuff to WoW that there is still like they haven't beat all the life out of it yet. And you see those sparks. The issue is they treat it like it's a live service gotcha game and all the live service gotcha games have a leg up on them where you have more of the buy in and like the FOMO and all that stuff. And I'm so sick of FOMO. I I like I don't like at least in gotcha games I know you're going to get a rerun, right? I miss a character. You were making fun of me for not having like Mourn. I finally got her, right? Because there was a rerun. And so yeah, I did. Did you get Len, too? I did. And so like and and I have all these characters and and it it's nice, but like I I don't really need to worry about it, right? I can come back in like a year and my characters are still going to be pretty good. Like with World of Warcraft, like if you come back in 6 months, you're just totally gassed out. Like that's the weird thing is there's this learned like just helplessness now. Now it's like why would I play? Because nothing matters anymore. So it's like nothing matters. Everything gets reset in four months. Who cares about anything? It used to feel so real. Like getting a piece of gear, it was like buying your first house in the real world. Like it felt like that impactful. And even when when going back and playing classic, like people say things about nostalgia and all this stuff. I remember when NMP let me get the turning tide. You you know I remember or not the turning tide. What's the the the sword? It's blue. It's it's got like the jagged edges. It's blue and it's got the green words. That's not the turning tide. Turning tide's one that looks like the you know the one I'm talking about off KT. You're right. It is the turning tide. So, you're thinking of the turning tide. That's the sword. It is an item level 226 sword. It has haste, crit, and uh uh and and what it has a lot of spell power. Well, it has spell power. Yes, it is good for paladins. Yeah, it's the best for for holy paladins, which is what he was. And then you were a warlock, which is also what's the best for you. Yeah. Yeah, I know. And you know why he gave it to me? Because you would be more useful doing it. You were probably trying to do Sartherian three drakes and you need to beat DPS checks. I was I was snapshotting and he was like, "Dude, your damage is insane." I will remember that. Till the day I [ __ ] die. I would put that on my tombstone. That was like one of those moments. That was a very big That's a very big deal. Yeah, because I if you remember there was also a staff that had more sockets than any other staff. and I forget what it's called, but if you use that as an affliction warlock in Wrath because you're able to snapshot, you do your opener with the uh crit weapon and have all the crit sockets in it. So, it's not crit you can get in the game. You snapshot the crit and then you switch to your haste weapon for the remainder of the fight. Yeah. For better GCDs. Yeah. So, you roll the dots the whole time and then you're getting more shadow bolts out with the haste. So, you have like a crit set that then you swap and dude. Oh, man. I had the full setup and then stop playing with everybody. Would you hand me a coffee, Papa? Thanks. It's not worth it. Wow. It's not worth it, bro. How about that? That's crazy. Like, it's actually not worth it. It's like they they like she's just so entitled to certain things, too. Yeah. Like like um she brought it So, we we do like couples therapy cuz we live in LA. That's cute. Yeah. So, like we we do that at the end of the therapy session. Dude, she took away my favorite thing in the world at the end of the last therapy session. What was it? I'm not allowed to call her Slamhog anymore. She told the therapist, bro, she goes, "Oh yeah, um it it literally it was like it was like we had two minutes left of therapy and she goes to our female therapist." "Oh yeah, can you tell him to stop calling me slam hog?" And the therapist was just like, "What's wrong with the word? You don't like the word?" No, I I like to be told nice things, not not demeaning things. Well, I What's demeaning about that? I don't think it's that bad. It's It's a joke. I don't find it funny when I hear it 10 times a day. I call him Baldi 10 times a I think that's me. Yeah. I don't think it's a big deal. It's just the truth. Like I mean I look in a mirror. I look in a mirror. I mean like [ __ ] not looking too good. Slam off. No. I didn't Hey, I did not say that. I did not say that. You did not say that. Pet names are like sacred. Like I smush him puss. That's not That's not as bad. Bumps. I was telling him he could literally call me fat ass and I wouldn't be a like a fat like that's fine. And I'd be like, "Yeah, I have a fat ass." But I don't call her slam hog outright. Come here, slam me. Come here, slam. I don't like it. It's cuz he's a stupid. Call me something cute. Call me something nice. Yeah, but but then I'm like, "Okay, so what do you like? What do you want me to call you?" And she's like princess. No, I don't want to be I don't want to be called princess. I never said that. We're naming this cat. So we got a cat. I think it's We're getting a cat. Oh no. Did I tell you we're getting a cat? So we're getting a cat. Literally one time I was like, "Hey," it was in the morning. She was she was like, "Dude, this is also you want to hear how anti-Semitic she is." So we're we're literally she wears me down. She's showing me cats trying to spend money. Dude, it goes deep. She keeps showing me all these videos. Cats and all this stuff. She's wearing me down. Then one time finally where I'm like, "Hey honey, you want to like make love?" She goes, "If we can get a cat." Oh, is that what you told me that like that you you ended up doing that? Just Yeah. So then then it happened. So now we're getting a cat because she trapped me. But then here's how anti-Semitic she is. Yeah. Cuz tell you can't tell me that if I wasn't Jewish, she wouldn't think this. She then I start getting excited about the cat cuz we're doing all this stuff. It's getting close. And she goes, "Oh my god." I go, "What?" She goes, "Did you trick me into tricking you into getting the cat and this was all your master plan and you wanted the cat the whole time just because you didn't want to spend the money on the cat and you wanted to make me spend the money on the cat?" OH, THAT'S BIG. I WOULDN'T PUT That's a good idea. I wouldn't put it past him. Why wouldn't you put it past him? He was way too against it at first and then he was way too eager afterwards. Like he was very suspicious. She's like, "I wouldn't put it past that big nose tricky little grabler." The grabler. Yeah. She She's like, "Look at the grer grappling." And then she keeps bringing it up. She's like, "And then I have to pay for the whole cat." Like, what do you mean? Here's the thing. I'm happy to pay for the cat, but I want naming rights. Well, he's he's trying to name my cat that I've spent over,000 on so far. What do you want to name the cat? I have a few names. Well, I mean, what about uh Romeo? Gay. Mr. Darcy. Mr. Dude, her best friend. Her best friend, a girl looked at me and Warick. She loved me. That's like Isn't that from Elden Ring? No. What the Warick Davis? He's an actor. Never mind. I like the name I like this name. No, no, the name. I like Book. Book. Yeah, Book. Book the Cat. I I also like Duck. I think Duck is a good name. Come here, Duck. Um I like um what was the other name that I really liked? Uh [ __ ] What was the other one we liked? That we liked? Oh, well, the only name that we're kind of close on is Walter. Walter? We both like Walter. That's the only agreed on Walter. We like lost. Isn't it like really cheap to get a cat? You just go to the shelter and you just go like the fluffy one. I've been trying. So, I've been saving strays lately. And now I feel really bad cuz there's all these adorable little strays that need homes. And I want I want our like expensive kitty to have a little brother to grow up with. You're going to get like one of the fancy cats. Is it Is it going to have the [ __ ] up ears? The folded ears. Oh, that's a SC like a Scottish fold. No, we're getting a ragd doll. It's a beautiful cat. I'll show you after. They're very fluffy with piercing blue eyes. I just I don't know. Like I never like the way that my dad and I used to always get cats is that we would just put food out until there was a cat and then that's the new cat. Like man, this cat looks an awful lot like a possum. Well, that's what happened actually one time. Yeah. Well, yeah. Well, you don't have the pet possum anymore. Uh, no. No, he's not. He's not in the house. And uh, but they used to get in the house pretty regularly. Oh boy. Oh my god. Well, they're not even aggressive, are they? No, possums are sick. Raccoons are a problem. Even the raccoons don't cause problems as long as you don't like Well, they will actually because they'll try to [ __ ] everything up. Yeah. Yeah. I I don't like raccoons. They're big. They're like clumsy. They don't care. Like they they will fall down. They don't give a [ __ ] They'll knock things over. They don't give a [ __ ] They don't give a [ __ ] about anything. They they like they feel like they know what's annoying and they find it funny. I know that they don't probably actually, but they're they're like they'll rip buttons off your shirts and piss on a pile of clothes and you're just like what the [ __ ] It's a wild animal. What do you expect? Are you asking to put that down? I mean a a p do. There you go. I just I don't have somewhere near me to put it down. It's fine. actually [ __ ] wild. But dude, you know what's uh you know what's really crazy, man? You still haven't defended the fact that you shouldn't vote. I expect to yell at him. Me personally? Yeah. Well, no. Women. All women should vote. Of course it Okay. So, I think that there should be a test for voting for everybody. For everybody. Everybody should take the test. I agree with that. But I assume that the results of that test will be biased. Well, here's the thing with the testing. Doesn't that like take away the thing is whether it's educated or not, like we're all living in this country and should have a say. Well, we should change. I mean, like that's I don't I don't if somebody Okay. So, would you want everybody to have a say in like how your car gets repaired? Um, probably not. No. No. And so would you want to have everybody have a say on how to make a hamburger? No. Because there's some people that are better at making hamburgers and some people that are better at fixing cars. And that's just the way I That's just the way I [ __ ] see it. And I'm telling you, well, by the way, they used to do this. This is the way it used to be. And I'm telling you that's I I that everybody should have to take it. You're right. They shouldn't. There should there are at least probably like three or four women that I would say should be able to vote. Well, altogether. Yeah. That's every single one he's met. Yeah. Uh democracy. You can't really think that. Uh no. I mean like I So I I think it's really it's just it's a test, right? I think that like you know you have a bunch of people like people don't know what the hell they're doing. Like if if you don't know how many states there are, I don't think you should vote, right? I mean, like I think it's pretty reasonable, but like I'm not I don't feel like I'm that crazy. Okay, I don't hear me out. I don't think it's unreasonable. I just And like I said, it's not like I I care that much about it personally, but it just it makes more sense to me that just regardless like everyone everybody has to have a right whether they're educated on it or not, like they should have a say. I I obviously think that I I think I think everybody should have the right to vote actually. I do, but I think that everybody should always champion what's best for them. I think that's how the democracy works. But I do think that there are inevitably differences between men and women. And I don't think that that's a bad thing. I think that like for example, I think one of the best things I don't know any guys that play that Disney game. I'll tell you that. David does. David David got her into it. David's the one who got me into it. He's like, "Melissa, you have to play it. You'll love it." No. No, he doesn't. Yeah, I swear. Oh, no, he does. It was David. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry to break it to Dude's a [ __ ] What the [ __ ] You do You do know a guy. They got in a fight one time. We were all hanging out. I don't know what I I'm going to know. I don't know what to do with myself. We We were all hanging out. They got This is This is too much. They got in a fight over what crop gave the most money per hour and she won the argument and he like had he had a spreadsheet. Damn. He was that he had…

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